"... I don't want to forget. I don't... I don't want to think that the last few years were a waste. I don't... I don't want to... to think about how he was dying already... how my teammates take that medicine, too. I just... I just wanted to do the right thing when the law never would."

He wipes his face with his sleeve, straightening up a little. "I don't... know how to live with all of this. It's too much."