[He doesn't move- his eyes are distant, not glazed, but distant, and swimming with tears.]
...I told y'. Y' ain't gonna see anyone familiar, b'cause it ain't th' same face. If it was, I'm sorry- y' probably hated me too. Ev'n goin' down, [he adds, and there's a choke as he says that- as he squeezes his eyes shut, remembering that even going to their deaths, all they did was spit, jeer, and snarl at how somehow, it was his fault.] ...ev'n goin' down, goin' first, they hated me.
...maybe tha's how I got a second shot, I dunno. ...I know they ain't all hate...th'..th' kids were jus' confused...an' plenty 'f th' others were jus' scared, I...
[He's rambling, softly, quietly, because ultimately the tragedy has never been something one simply...gets over. It comes back in nightmares for a reason, and with a shuddering breath he stops himself.]
...can't ev'n r'member my name from tha' time, 'f I'm honest.
no subject
...I told y'. Y' ain't gonna see anyone familiar, b'cause it ain't th' same face. If it was, I'm sorry- y' probably hated me too. Ev'n goin' down, [he adds, and there's a choke as he says that- as he squeezes his eyes shut, remembering that even going to their deaths, all they did was spit, jeer, and snarl at how somehow, it was his fault.] ...ev'n goin' down, goin' first, they hated me.
...maybe tha's how I got a second shot, I dunno. ...I know they ain't all hate...th'..th' kids were jus' confused...an' plenty 'f th' others were jus' scared, I...
[He's rambling, softly, quietly, because ultimately the tragedy has never been something one simply...gets over. It comes back in nightmares for a reason, and with a shuddering breath he stops himself.]
...can't ev'n r'member my name from tha' time, 'f I'm honest.
...probably got cursed, really.