Taking Some Me-Time [Open Catch-All]

[worthallthis]

Who: Bucky Barnes AKA Soldat, and OPEN
Where: Each prompt will have a car listed
When: Kazoo 13 and 14
What: The Bottomless Pit has something to say about self-care, and Soldat comes back
Warnings: Amiable disassociation, possible discussion of trauma


I. A First Time For Everything - Kitchen Car, Kazoo 13

This is ridiculous. The Bottomless Pit (that is not their name, but they don't know their name anymore, so they have accepted it for now) is not having any more of this "not sleeping" and "not eating" and "not taking care of the body" thing that is happening. The Sergeant slipped away during the morning unconscious time, and the Asset is close but not interested in shooting anything, and the actual host is still hiding and it is entirely unacceptable.

So the Bottomless Pit is using the body. The Bottomless Pit is in the kitchen car piling a plate high with as much food (and some not food) that they can scrounge up, and the Bottomless Pit is going to eat it all.

Anyone walking in early this morning will find Soldat muttering to themselves under their breath, only it's not English or Russian like usual, but some kind of sing-song, tonal, almost grammarless language. "No caring, no eating, no comfort, no nothing," they say to themselves. "All idiots. All stupid. Too much thinking. No, angry one, I want that--" A pause. "--well, if angry one is certain. Not wanting to hurt the body."

They put the plastic ceran wrap away. They won't eat it. Fine.


II. Taking It For Themselves - Spa car, Kazoo 13

The plate is taken from the kitchen to the spa car. And they wait outside until they're certain it's empty.

Then they go inside, close and lock and barricade both doors, and finally strip down to drop themselves into the hottest of the tiered pools with a happy sigh. The Bottomless Pit is finally warm and comfortable and is going to just sit and eat in peace.

Anyone trying to get from the sleepers to the armory and beyond, or going the other direction for that matter, will have to bang on the door for a while, shove the heavy shelving and massage tables blocking the doors away, or teleport through. The Bottomless Pit will not help. The Bottomless Pit will yell in the host's stupid human voice, "Go away! We are having a bath!"


III. Waking Up Again - Kazoo 13, Sleeper car Lower 2:A, closed to roommates

The Bottomless Pit sent the body to bed after the bath, and they actually slept, and now... Soldat wakes up. This is why no one else had wanted to sleep. They stay in bed for a good chunk of the day, which is stupid, and means if one of their roommates comes in, they'll find them bundled under their bearskin blanket, awake but not wanting to move.

"Hi," they say wearily. "Sorry. I'll get up." They do not get up, at least not until evening, at which point they trudge into the kitchen for some dinner and then sit in the standard car listening to people, or music, or both.


IV. Back To Normal (?) - Wildcard me, all over, Kazoo 14

The next day Soldat makes themselves get back to work. They have meals to cook and prep, people to teach the basics of falling and fighting, people who probably worried about them. So it's back into their standard routine they go, from patrol to kitchen to afternoon nap to kitchen to training car to patrol. And squeezed in between, they seek out a handful of people to talk to.

The Asset needs apologized for. Some people probably need reassurance that they're okay after their day of being very much not themselves. A couple people need a proper explanation of what happened in the maze.

They can't seem to find Steve, though, which is... weird....

Comments

dining car probably late breakfast period 14

[morganizedchaos]

Ghost has been set up for maybe half an hour with coffee and psychology books once again - he's really trying to make progress through them at a decent clip, now - but as soon as Soldat comes within reasonable talk-to distance, he looks up.

"Welcome back." His phone is balanced near the edge of the table, along with the notebook filled with cluttered notes. Without really looking at the page, he scribbles out another line - something about the hypothalamus. "Feeling any better?"

[worthallthis]

Soldat sets a new coffee in front of him, though ostensibly they'd been coming in to deliver a fresh plate of cinnamon rolls-- a new thing they tried for the first time this morning; they may or may not be a little underdone, but they're still edible, and the frosting is tasty. "I don't know yet. But I'm out of bed. And out of my own head. So that's something."

[morganizedchaos]

The great thing about being a post-apocalyptic alien dude is that you aren't picky about cinnamon rolls being maybe not perfect.

And the best thing about telekinesis is being able to eat them without getting your hands sticky. Ghost floats one off of the plate and lets it hover near his shoulder, where he can take a bite out of it when he feels like it.

"It's a start," he agrees, with a slight smile and a nod. "Need me to catch you up on the last two days, or did the others handle it?"

[worthallthis]

"Nobody did anything except tell me I'm a jerk, an idiot, and boring," Soldat says with a shake of their head. They shift to lean on the back of one of the nearby chairs. "I remember a couple things, pieces here and there. But mostly I just wasn't here at all."

They did make one educated guess, though no one has confirmed it, so they ask, "Did the Bottomless Pit actually... come out?"

[morganizedchaos]

"Oh, yeah, and it blocked off the spa car for a couple of hours to boot." Ghost may have also taught it where the serving platters are kept. Giant plates are appropriate for its purposes. "I think it might have also outed you as a we to anyone who hadn't heard by that point and tried to come through, just so you're forewarned."

He takes a bite of the floating cinnamon roll, telekinesis moving it closer as though it were actually attached to a hand, and pauses as though he's actually using his mouth to talk for a minute before adding, "I think I managed to out-weird the Asset by turning into a mug," without any further preamble.

IV

[bakegarasu]

Otoha wanders over to the dining car at around lunchtime. He's been... okay, but trying to deal with the shit in his own head.

It's not working that well. He's not sure how Soldat can do this with what, four people?

He's relieved to see Soldat back in the kitchen - Sarge told him he's no good at cooking, the Asset wouldn't bother, and... he hasn't seen the other one.

Soldat gets a small smile as he leans on the counter near him. "... Hey there. Uh. Welcome back?"

[worthallthis]

Soldat takes all that in with a slightly stricken expression. Then they drop their face onto their arms on the back of the chair with a groan. "I think I've pretty well outed with everyone, at this point, between the three of them." (You wanted a bath. I wanted a bath. The only way to do that was take the car! Also, I don't think it was out-weirding anything. The Asset just ran out of things to shoot and couldn't handle it. That's the most either of you have said since I woke up.)

[worthallthis]

"Yeah, it's me." They offer Otoha a little smile, in the middle of mixing up a salad. The voice, body language, expressions-- all right for the guy Otoha got to know first. "Apparently it's been busy around here. I, uh. Hear literally every one of them took a turn with my body over the past couple days."

[bakegarasu]

"Yeah... even the uh... pit guy? I don't know, I didn't meet him. It? I don't know, sorry. Uh. ... Been kind of up in my own head in a different way."

Not that he minds the others, but he likes Soldat a lot.

[morganizedchaos]

Ghost gives... Well, the general vicinity of Soldat a look, but it's mostly intended for the Pit. It's one of those looks.

"Also, we did finish the mission," he continues. "The voice in the sky was a whiny baby - not literal - and threw a fit before vanishing. The Asset did try to shoot it, but I don't think that did anything. Everyone was still getting people back to the city when I left - I took the panic button out in the hopes of getting a few hours of relative quiet in the train before everyone else got back." Because he was absolutely beat after all that.

And tomorrow's platform day. Whoo.

IV. Back To Normal

[yondu]

Yondu's another person that could use the reassurance. He's actually in the library reading on one of Soldat's pass-throughs (a rare day of him not being in the music car) and he whistles a hello at him. Again the SCA dutifully translates the mood of it.

He looks a little more... normal, maybe? He hopes so. And hopes that he didn't mind all that awkwardness with Sarge.

"How you doin'?" he calls out with his regular raspy vocals.

III Roomie times

[controlsthedie]

Thanatos has been distracted and lost within his own head the past few days. He has noticed something off with Soldat, but he doesn't pry. Who knows what weird things become normal for a mortal when their soul is in a lantern. They seem to have things under control for the most part.

"It's fine. Do you need something to eat?" Soldat should already know that Thanatos will just shift over to the kitchen and back with something in tow. He just does that.

[worthallthis]

"Don't blame you one bit." Soldat can only imagine their own stress levels, if they'd been out there. They're not sure how much of what they feel is gratitude that they didn't have to deal with it, and guilt that they didn't even try.

There's an actual problem in that, though: "So we saved the city but didn't stop whatever was behind the problem. They got away?" Which means whoever or whatever it was, they're going to run into them again. Which means more of those awful illusions.

[worthallthis]

"Them," Soldat offers with a little smile. "The Pit is a them, Sarge is a he, the Asset has no actual gender besides 'gun', but is most comfortable with it." They scoot their bowl over some to get at the chopped walnuts that are going in next. "So what's bothering you, that's kept you up in your own head?"

[worthallthis]

The whistle brings a smile, and it's a proper Soldat smile: restrained but warm, clearly fond. They mimic the whistle back, near-perfect. "Back to actually being me. I hear everyone else in here has had a real field day while I was. Uh. Distracted." They wave vaguely at their head, looking maybe a shade embarrassed. "I do want to apologize for that. You should never've had to deal with the Asset. Or the Pit, if you ran into them." Sarge, at least, is friendly for the most part.

[worthallthis]

(Yes. Pit, you just stuffed us full just a few hours ago. That was then!) Regardless, Soldat is always hungry, whether they need something to eat or not. That doesn't mean they're going to ask for anything. They weren't a good asset the past couple of days; asking isn't something they get to do yet.

Soldat shakes their head a little against the pillows, knowing they ought to get up. This is being rude, staying curled up in bed with someone else in here. It seems like so much effort, though. Maybe Thanatos will forgive them for being a little rude. "Had a big breakfast. Apparently. I wasn't really there for it."

[yondu]

"I didn't mind dealin' with the Asset. I get where it came from. Didn't see the Bottomless Pit, but I was just worried about ya."

Everybody breaks sometimes, though. And he's done enough screaming about people being soft and being screamed at for being soft to judge someone for just needing a goddamn break.

"Where ya headed?"

[morganizedchaos]

"Yelled a lot and disappeared, yeah, complete with dramatic comic book villain 'you haven't seen the last of me' speech." Ghost rolls his eyes. "The words 'you will weep before my majesty' were uttered." He does something with the voice synth on the quote that results in it sounding like Morgan but bass-boosted. "But as far as I'm concerned, that's next mission's problem, and we need a little more recovery time before we think about it."

Unless whatever it is comes after the train directly, but if they're looking for a home, Ghost is willing to bet they won't show up until then. Even a few days will help right now, though.

Just Roomie Things

[marvelous_murderbot]

She had, of course, been deeply concerned about him. She hadn't needed to stand watch, not really, but she had regardless. Whatever was happening to him, he needed both time, and defending. Just in case. She also has a box on her lap, which is the only part of the entire situation that seems to worry her.

She expressed her care and affection in odd ways, but this really ought to be expected.

"No," she says, when he stirs, "you should rest." She taps her hands on a tupperware in her hands, before pushing it on top of the blanket he's under.

"I have made you cookies. I thought you would require sugar-based energy when you woke up."

They are passable, even though she put significantly more chocolate in them than one really ought to. In several different colors, because she liked them.

[worthallthis]

"You'd be surprised how melodramatic villains can be," Soldat says wearily, as half a dozen hazy, nightmarish memories of different handlers come to mind almost immediately, including Pierce. Hell, even the terrifying doctor with the glasses had his penchant for it.... "Don't make them any less dangerous."

They wonder if they can remember enough of the formula that Kuai and Pudding used in Beacon to make the illusions less potent. God, they wish their stupid head had let them into the lab, at least once....

"You're right, though. I know I ain't in any condition to do much about it right now." If they ever will be.

[worthallthis]

"Nowhere in particular. Just kinda looking for people." And they drift over the rest of the way to find a seat near Yondu's, just a regular table's chair rather than one of the bean bags or armchairs. They sit on it backwards, folding their arms over the back, wanting something to rest their chin on. "That's nice of you to worry, though. I'm all right. Just that. Chair. I panicked."

Yeah, definitely embarrassed. "It's what HYDRA used to take my memories."

[worthallthis]

Well, that is one way to get them to move at least some. Soldat lifts their head, blinking at her, then at the box. "Guri... you didn't need to do that."

But they do prop themselves up on the metal arm and push the bearskin blanket back some. The allure of cookies is a hard one to resist, and they feel kind of guilty, actually, for clearly making her worry enough to make them something.

[yondu]

His expression turns about as sympathetic as that haggard, scarred old face can get.

"...Yeah, I figured," he admits.

"I saw Sarge remember a coupla things though. Remembered what 'marsupials' were. Talked about how y'all got three names. Like when your mama would yell all three at you to make you behave."

And then he wrinkles his nose a little. "Don't know how new they were."

[marvelous_murderbot]

Oh, no, she isn't worried at all. Note her completely unworried face. There isn't an ounce of worry in her about her friend descending into a deep, dark place thanks to recent events, oh no.

"I had no other tasks," she says, as if that explains why she'd make a beeline towards it.

II.

[vanity_fair]

"Yeah? Well, bath time's over, bucko," Tony bellows right back, annoyed and all too ready to pick a fight in the name of something extraordinarily petty this morning. It's been a Week, he had another shitty nightmare last night, his patience is thin, and his coffee is going cold.

"Put a sock on the cabin handle like the rest of us if you want a private jerk sesh."