"I won't be the only one to ever see you," Koumyou does, at least, look up at him now, expression... he looks like he's going to cry. "I'm... I'm temporary, Devero. I'm just... I'm not worth..."

Yep, tears are happening, and Koumyou drops his head to hide behind his bangs, shaking.

Very quietly, voice trembling, he says, "That kind of happiness isn't... it isn't for someone like me. I'm not... you can't tie yourself like that to a scared old man who fails everyone, even himself. It's not right. You're so wonderful and I'm... I'm not."

He seems to shrink in on himself further, shoulders up near his ears under his robes. The dressing car had been open for this event, but Koumyou had chosen to just wear his uniform. Just here to observe a curiosity, a mere spectator...

"What if someone younger and hotter boards the train next platform, or the one after that?" Koumyou cries quietly, "Someone who loves and understands technology, who can-- you deserve--!" And here, he cuts himself off with a near-silent sob, lifting his joined forearms in his sleeves to muffle himself against them.

He so, so, so badly would love to be selfish about this and...

It would be the kind of dream come true that he's not even let himself think about.

But he can't just, accept it. Not without some coaxing, anyway. A lifetime of forced asceticism has really taken a toll on him.