Mouri Ran (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
singlefaith) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
voidtreckerexpress2021-01-10 07:26 pm
singlefaith) wrote in voidtreckerexpress2021-01-10 07:26 pm
And all my walls began to shake
Who: Ran (both closed and open prompts)
Where: Various
When: In the few days after departing the Winter Faire after this log and after new arrivals
What: Ran deals with the aftermath of learning about Shinichi
Warnings: N/A?
A. Closed to Ai - The night after the fair, after carrying him back to the train, Ran had holed up in one of the quiet rooms with him, talking. Exhaustion -- mental, emotional, and physical -- had seeped in, and she'd slowly drifted off as they spoke. At some point he'd woken her up, encouraged her to go to bed, and she'd stumbled half-asleep down the darkened hallways to her cabin, crawling into her bed for full rest.
In the morning she awakens still wearing the same clothes she had the day before, her hair mussed, dark marks beneath her eyes. Climbing down the ladder to her bunk, she catches sight of Ai still sleeping. She pauses a moment, a small furrow between her brows -- then grabs her gi and goes to change. She'll return in a few minutes to put last night's clothes on the bed.
B. Open - Ran will slowly seek out a few people who Shinichi has indicated know about him over the next few days, so feel free to reply as though she's found them if your character is one of these. Alternatively, they (or anyone else) can find her in the gym, spa, or kitchen:
Gym - Ran is most often here, attacking the practice dummies and bags with unusual focus and fervor -- sometimes to the point where she looks as though she could have well killed one if it had been alive. Indeed, she has snapped one of the bags from its chain again, and one of the dummies is looking more than a little worse for wear.
Spa - Find Ran in the sauna, wrapped up in a towel and trying to listen to birdsongs. She may get awkward and leave, though, if someone male enters.
Kitchen - Ran stress cooks. Though it's not her team's turn to prepare food, she can likely be found in the kitchen either puzzling over one of the new recipes or trying to make something good out of what basic ingredients are available. Again, much focus, and possibly more mess than she normally makes.
Where: Various
When: In the few days after departing the Winter Faire after this log and after new arrivals
What: Ran deals with the aftermath of learning about Shinichi
Warnings: N/A?
A. Closed to Ai - The night after the fair, after carrying him back to the train, Ran had holed up in one of the quiet rooms with him, talking. Exhaustion -- mental, emotional, and physical -- had seeped in, and she'd slowly drifted off as they spoke. At some point he'd woken her up, encouraged her to go to bed, and she'd stumbled half-asleep down the darkened hallways to her cabin, crawling into her bed for full rest.
In the morning she awakens still wearing the same clothes she had the day before, her hair mussed, dark marks beneath her eyes. Climbing down the ladder to her bunk, she catches sight of Ai still sleeping. She pauses a moment, a small furrow between her brows -- then grabs her gi and goes to change. She'll return in a few minutes to put last night's clothes on the bed.
B. Open - Ran will slowly seek out a few people who Shinichi has indicated know about him over the next few days, so feel free to reply as though she's found them if your character is one of these. Alternatively, they (or anyone else) can find her in the gym, spa, or kitchen:
Gym - Ran is most often here, attacking the practice dummies and bags with unusual focus and fervor -- sometimes to the point where she looks as though she could have well killed one if it had been alive. Indeed, she has snapped one of the bags from its chain again, and one of the dummies is looking more than a little worse for wear.
Spa - Find Ran in the sauna, wrapped up in a towel and trying to listen to birdsongs. She may get awkward and leave, though, if someone male enters.
Kitchen - Ran stress cooks. Though it's not her team's turn to prepare food, she can likely be found in the kitchen either puzzling over one of the new recipes or trying to make something good out of what basic ingredients are available. Again, much focus, and possibly more mess than she normally makes.
no subject
She pauses. Then, a little more gently, "I try not to dwell on those thoughts."
no subject
But.
That's not quite what's being said here, is it? She tries to cling to that, tries to hear it, eyes slipping closed, silent for a few moments.
"I told you that I'm doubting all of my perceptions," she says softly. "Unlike Shinichi, I didn't know you before. You say that the person I knew is real, that you're not good at acting . . . but can you understand that given how much I've just learned has been kept from me, given being told how much I should be afraid of everything I'm learning, it's hard to just fall back into the same kind of conviction? I want to believe. But when you say something like that, about being okay with redoing it . . . it scares me."
A breath. "Maybe I didn't ask the question the right way -- or the question that I really want. Would you want to go back now?"
"I think . . . I'm trying to get a sense of who Miyano Shiho really is. Because even if she can't act, I only ever got pieces. I think . . . I need to understand in order to go back to the conviction that I had."
no subject
But at the same time, she can't bear to be... associated with them, either. The two feelings wage war for a little while Haibara contemplates what to say.
In the end, neither side wins. She simply... talks, and lets the words come out what may.
"Miyano Shiho was a scientist. She wanted to follow her parents' footsteps, but she was forced to work with criminals to do it, even she didn't approve of it. But her sister had struck a deal to get her out of the Organization, so all she had to do was keep going, one day at a time, until the day she could leave with her sister."
"When her sister died, that path was ripped away from her. She refused to cooperate, and ran, and from that Haibara Ai was born."
"So no, I wouldn't go back to them. They are antithesis to everything I stand for. And with Kudo-kun, I've even chosen to stop running, to fight back, as best I can."
"Does that answer your question, Mouri-san?"
no subject
It was more than she'd expected, in truth. Ai has never been prone to pouring out her words, to explanations, and definitely not to speaking about herself at a personal level. The vulnerability of it, knowing what she's being given, helps -- perhaps just as much as the story itself. She tries to give her thank you due gravity; it's important for Shiho to understand that Ran knows what has been given.
"I'm sorry . . . both for your parents and your sister. They took a lot from you."