Unwavering Bond (open)

[blue_ice]

Who: Seto, Yugi, and their family and friends
Where: Sports Gym
When: Nebula 19
What: Two dweebs with cards get hitched.
Warnings: Dangerous levels of sap. Proceed cautiously.

[ On the evening of Nebula 18, Seto pops onto the ICP screens. The only thing different about his appearance is that his hair is slicked back (someone's experimenting), and he clears his throat. ]

...Good evening. We hinted at it during our game the other day, and we've told a few of our closest friends, but it's official. Yugi and I are getting married tomorrow night. We realize it's last minute, but a few recent circumstances forced our hands and we didn't find it prudent to wait anymore.

As it's last minute, we don't expect a lot of company, but anyone's welcome to witness it. Don't worry, it's going to be a very quick ceremony by wedding standards. We'll also have light snacks afterward.

---

[ After...not that much planning, to be honest, the day is here. The gym is clean, with about 30 chairs lined up in front of a clear space. A small smattering of blue and purple balloons decorates the hall, and overall it's just set up to be a quiet commitment ceremony.

Let's see if it stays that way. ]

Comments

[subcircuits]

"Yes," Devero says, the soft way he breathes the single syllable seeming to imbue it with more significance than just agreement. "And I'm here with you." That, too, seems to carry a heavier weight than just pointing out an obvious fact.

See, Koumyou's not the only one who's had thoughts of weddings and his current dance partner simultaneously. He sure doesn't squash his, though; he savors them.

But he doesn't push any further than that immediately, instead guiding Koumyou into the spritely steps of one of the many dances from his home reality that he's taught to his boyfriend.

[its_dad_sanzo]

And Koumyou is as pleased as punch to have the distraction of an upbeat dance. He's certainly better at them now that he's been taught the moves and isn't just reacting to tiny micro-cues from his partner!

[subcircuits]

Dancing with Koumyou is always a joy. Getting to show off in public? Well, who could blame Devero for putting Koumyou-- putting them both, really-- through their paces? While they're dancing, light-footed and light-hearted, Devero's mind is on the next few steps and the next song (and, yeah, on putting on a performance); but after only a few songs he's the one who signals a stop, pulling Koumyou after him to the edge of the dance floor.

He doesn't want to show off too much at his friend's wedding, after all.

Which thought leads inevitably to the next one, blurted out before he can think twice about it: "I can't wait to dance with you at our wedding."

[its_dad_sanzo]

Koumyou...

Koumyou manages to fail at breathing just then, a startled gasp going in wrong and sending him into a coughing fit.

And he croaks out from behind his free hand; "--Our what, now?"

This... this has not been a given, to Koumyou. Very much the opposite, in fact.

[subcircuits]

Oh shit. The screeching of mental hydraulics locking up is probably audible to half the gym as Devero flinches, the color draining from his face.

"I-- I'm sorry!" he says quickly. "I didn't mean--" But he did, so he doesn't finish the protest. He covers his mouth with his hands instead, horrified that he's just let his selfish, needy romantic little fantasy slip.

[its_dad_sanzo]

Devero going pale like that and obviously panicking has Koumyou taking hold of one of his arms in his free hand, still coughing a bit into his other.

"It's okay, Dev."

He won't hold it against him. Simple mistake, right?

[subcircuits]

Koumyou's touch calms Dev, although he can't relax entirely with him coughing like that. He reaches over to rub Koumyou's back soothingly.

"Sorry," he says again. Ducking his head and looking away, he admits, "I think about it a lot."

[its_dad_sanzo]

"I... try not to."

With mixed results, of course.

His coughs calmed down enough to talk normally, Koumyou pats the arm he's been holding. Consolingly.

"You'll marry someday if you want to, Dev. I'm sure of it. And it will be lovely."

[subcircuits]

See, this is why Devero's embarrassed to have let this slip. It's Koumyou he wants to marry, but he knows the priest isn't ready. Isn't this perfect proof of that, the way he automatically deflects Devero's 'our wedding' to a Koumyou-less 'you'll marry someday'?

He droops a little, chewing on his lower lip to ward off the anxious agitation he can feel brewing while he tries to figure out how to do the least damage when he responds.

"I'll be happy if I can just keep dancing with you," he says finally, covering Koumyou's hand on his arm with his own free hand. "Even if it's only ever at other people's weddings."

[its_dad_sanzo]

Just like Yondu had put into words for Devero previously; Koumyou can't let himself... he can only think of Devero walking away as their best case scenario.

Walking away and finding someone to marry. Someone better. It isn't a high bar, in Koumyou's opinion.

And that's certainly a better scenario than all the gruesome deaths the priest can imagine (and watch, in his nightmares) befalling the other man. Or any number of other fates he's pondered.

But in the here and now...

"...You can always dance with me, Devero," Koumyou reaches up with his other hand to cup his cheek. "My big sweet romantic."

[subcircuits]

He covers Koumyou's hand with his own, his eyes going misty. "Thank you," he says softly, if a little sadly. "I don't ever want to take that for granted."

He doesn't want to take anything about his incredible relationship with this incredible man for granted. And he definitely doesn't want to risk it by pushing Koumyou to do things he's not-- and may never be-- ready for.

Even if his big, sweet romantic heart wants nothing more than to commit to Koumyou in that big, public way.

[its_dad_sanzo]

"But you seem sad, I..."

Koumyou trails off, thinking over what they've said. He can't easily pinpoint anything he'd done wrong, which... doesn't mean he hadn't. While he's thinking, his eyes search Devero's face, his expression concerned.

"I'm sorry. What's wrong?"

What did he do?

[subcircuits]

Oh, how observant his partner is; Devero's smile droops a little. He glances around, then reaches out to take the priest's hand and tow him further away from the dancing. He finds them an unoccupied stretch of wall to settle against. It's a bit distant from the festivities-- which means it's closer to the balloon-decorated 'altar' where the ceremony was held.

He lets go of Koumyou and sticks his hands in his pockets. "It's you I want to marry," he says in a rush, with his usual straightforwardness. "Not anyone else."

[its_dad_sanzo]

"But I'm..."

Koumyou doesn't finish that sentence for a moment, eyes dropping to the floor as he tucks his hands into his sleeves, gripping his forearms so very tightly.

"...I'm me."

He knows Devero will know what he means. So soon after Aquafir, after having to convince Koumyou he even wanted to physically fool around with him, that he didn't find his scrawny, ravaged body horrifying, with every visible rib and tendon...

Quieter, he repeats, hunching his shoulders and staring at the floor, "I'm me, Devero. You can do so, so, so much better. So much."

[subcircuits]

"How can I do better than the man who saw me?" he asks, his voice low but so impassioned. "How can I do better than the person who looked inside that jerk who boarded this train and saw-- saw me!?" He yanks his hands right back out of his pockets to gesture at himself. "I have never been happier in my entire goddamn life than I am here with you, Koumyou! Because of you, Koumyou!"

[its_dad_sanzo]

"I won't be the only one to ever see you," Koumyou does, at least, look up at him now, expression... he looks like he's going to cry. "I'm... I'm temporary, Devero. I'm just... I'm not worth..."

Yep, tears are happening, and Koumyou drops his head to hide behind his bangs, shaking.

Very quietly, voice trembling, he says, "That kind of happiness isn't... it isn't for someone like me. I'm not... you can't tie yourself like that to a scared old man who fails everyone, even himself. It's not right. You're so wonderful and I'm... I'm not."

He seems to shrink in on himself further, shoulders up near his ears under his robes. The dressing car had been open for this event, but Koumyou had chosen to just wear his uniform. Just here to observe a curiosity, a mere spectator...

"What if someone younger and hotter boards the train next platform, or the one after that?" Koumyou cries quietly, "Someone who loves and understands technology, who can-- you deserve--!" And here, he cuts himself off with a near-silent sob, lifting his joined forearms in his sleeves to muffle himself against them.

He so, so, so badly would love to be selfish about this and...

It would be the kind of dream come true that he's not even let himself think about.

But he can't just, accept it. Not without some coaxing, anyway. A lifetime of forced asceticism has really taken a toll on him.

[subcircuits]

When Koumyou buries his face in his sleeves to sob, Devero thinks his heart might break. He looks around-- it doesn't seem like anyone's directly observing them, but there are a more than a few people in here to celebrate with Seto and Yugi and it's only a matter of time before someone notices what's going on.

He doesn't want his selfishness to mar their well-deserved happiness, like it stands to threaten his own right now.

"I'm going to pick you up," he tells Koumyou, giving him no more warning than that before he kneels to scoop the wiry priest into his arms, clasping him into his chest and carrying him swiftly to the nearest door.

[its_dad_sanzo]

Koumyou certainly doesn't want to ruin the wedding either, so when he's scooped up he keeps his stupid, wet face hidden with his voluminous sleeves. It undoubtedly won't be the first time anyone in here has seen one of the boys scoop and move the other, with the close quarters of the train. So it might not even raise any red flags.

[subcircuits]

Devero even tries to wear a smile as he carries him out, like they're having a good time, like they're so overcome by the romance that they're running off for alone time.

...Which, in its way, is true. Just not in a good way.

"To our room?" he asks, ducking his head down close to Koumyou's as they hit the hallway.

[its_dad_sanzo]

Koumyou nods, miserable. And says a quiet, muffled, "I'm sorry."

They've hopefully managed to not damage the wedding, but... Devero had been having a good time, and now...

Well, it's further proof of how unsuitable Koumyou is, isn't it?

He repeats it quieter, too, "I'm really sorry."

Dev should have someone who can keep him out of his own despair, not someone who will drag him down into theirs! Devero deserves to always be happy, and to stay happy. He's gone through enough misery!

[subcircuits]

Devero doesn't respond to Koumyou's apologies, just carries him-- up a car, actually, but only to take the transgate in Standard straight to Sleeper One. It's barely a walk to get to their cabin in the double sleeper carriage from there....