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Who: Madoka and Jiang Cheng
When: Poi 1
Where: Jiang Cheng's cabin
What: Recent events have been troubling Madoka. What's better than seeking some comfort in dad hugs?
Warnings: Probably nothing.

Madoka figured that this feeling wouldn't just suddenly go away. After all, it's not like there's some sort of small matter she's troubled about. It's the fate of her entire world. Of her family. Of her friends. Of all the people in the entire world that she's let down by having been pulled into this place, rather than having been at the right place at the right moment to try and save them all.

.. and it's about her existence, too. If she got caught up in that destruction back home.. There's no way her body would have survived it, if it was comatose. And if her body is gone, then what is she by now..?

There's so many worries in her head. Even as she greets new people, as she talks to friends, as she figures out the new voting system.. She's worried.

It's like there's a pit in her stomach that she can't get rid of, and everything is sucked right into there. All her happiness. All her energy.

So even though Madoka hates to ask for help, she admits that maybe she has to in this case. Maybe she just has to get some comfort from someone, as much as she loathes to ask it. And while that decision is hard to make - the decision who to ask the comfort from isn't very hard in comparison. Once she finally makes her mind up, realising that maybe, just maybe it's okay to ask for some comfort, she finds her feet already guiding her in the direction of the cabin Jiang Cheng is staying in.

Madoka raises her hand slowly, knocking on the door. Once Jiang Cheng opens the door, he will find Madoka standing right there, looking incredibly dejected.

"Um.. sorry to bother you.."

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Jiang Cheng has not been faring much better.

It has been quiet for him on the train, a man who avoids most of the technology and focuses on the people he knows and recognises. For all that he might attempt to broaden his horizons at time it is comforting to be around those he cares for, even if he might be loathe to admit it. It makes him a touch more isolated than he might have been at home, but he's yet to have any issue with this particular arrangement.

He's hiding in his cabin for now, avoiding the chance of someone coming and demanding - or asking - him to do anything he has no want to do right now when the knock comes, and he pushes himself up and over to answer. Dressed in his hoodie and casuals he feels a little out of sorts, but that feeling soon goes away when he recognises just who it is that's come to see him.

And she looks uspet.

Frowning, he immediately opens the door wider and motions for her to come inside.

"You're not bothering me. Come in and sit down."

You can take the Sect Leader out of the Sect, but...

The response isn't entirely unsurprising on Jiang Cheng's part. For all the scary looks on his face, the other is never truly unkind to her. And he has never turned her away, even when he was feeling bad.

But despite it being unsurprising, Madoka still feels relief and gratitude in her heart at hearing that answer. It's just nice to know that she really does have him to rely on - especially at a moment like this. Especially when her feet feel like they're made out of lead as she drags them across the floor, moving to sit down on one of the bunks in the room.

She folds her hands in her lap. Neatly and politely, even though it's quite the contrast with how sad her big puppy eyes look.

"Thank you.. I've just been feeling so worried about everything lately, and I didn't know where else to go.." It's how quickly Jiang Cheng climbed the ladder in Madoka's mind. He's now already the person she goes to when she feels troubled - the one at the top of the list of Responsible Adults Madoka knows.

There are a few people that he might slam the door upon if they were to knock, but Madoka is absolutely not on that list. The idea of not supporting her if she came to find him is unthinkable to Jiang Cheng as he is now, not when he cares about her in the way that he does.

Not that he would admit it to anyone else, all things considered.

His eyes watch her as she moves across the room and he lets the door shut slowly behind him, shifting his weight to move after her. It's probably a good thing he's dressed more informally now or she might feel even more dour or on edge - which is not what he wants.

Carefully, he sits near her.

"It's good that you came here," he says with a nod. "Tell me what you're worried about."

"I've.. been thinking a lot."

She pauses. At least Madoka isn't super waffling on telling him, considering she came to see him in the first place. And the way he reassures her that she did the right thing in coming to talk to him makes it at least a little easier to speak up, though it's hard for the girl to ever fully not feel guilty over throwing her problems in someone else's lap like this.

But the reassurance is at least enough for her to speak on, though she seems to be choosing her words very carefully.

"About the things we were told." Madoka figures she doesn't have to clarify. Jiang Cheng is smart, and it's not like they've gotten any more important information than the huge slap they got with that information coming from the Ministry.

She slowly glances over at him.

".. you must have been thinking about it a lot too.."

Or so she figures. Jiang Cheng always seems like a very serious and responsible person. Madoka can't imagine that he wouldn't be worried about the idea that his body might be completely comatose back home right now, and all its implications and consequences.

"Sometimes."

Jiang Cheng frowns, thoughtful, considering for a moment. He tries to not think about all the things that are going on around him, mostly because some of them he genuinely does not understand. Being here on the train as long as he has hasn't helped much, not at the end of the day when he is from a world that is far, far beyond this one.

The technology doesn't make sense, the people around him are adapting at a speed that he's struggling to manage.

But he's done the reading, he's seen what has happened on the network, what they've been told. He's not sure if he trusts it, and it leaves an aching feeling in his gut when he thinks about it - because if he does anything else then he might fall apart, still carrying so many burdens, so many things that were pressing down on him and making him feel like he's shattering from the inside out.

"I want to fix it," he says, his voice low and soft. "I would like to go home, return to my Sect, to the people who need me. But I cannot do that yet, even with the information they tell me. So I listen, and I try to understand, because if I don't listen I think I might end up drinking whatever there is around here."

He can admit that - and maybe he shouldn't, to a child, someone who leans on him, but Jiang Cheng swallows the bitterness: he's had almost twenty years of practice.

"But people need me," he admits finally. "So you must do what you can to make sure you focus on that. On the things that you need to do to make the people you care about safe, and happy."

Nothing about what he says is all that surprising to Madoka. She knows that Jiang Cheng is a dutiful person. Of course he wishes, more than anything, to return to his Sect. Even the admission of weakness isn't too strange to Madoka, since she has long learned on this train that even adults struggle when the situation is this overwhelming.

And the conclusion he reaches..

.. well. That isn't too surprising either, isn't it? Jiang Cheng seems like someone who hurts so deeply, considering what she's seen from the man before. But he's also someone who hasn't given up. Not once, in all this time.

"Then.."

Madoka starts, then stops. She doesn't dare to look at the man's face, instead looking down, glancing at his hands.

"What.. if no one needs you anymore..?" This isn't about Jiang Cheng. Despite how scary their situation is, Madoka really loves to hope that they will find some way to get back to their bodies. That he will wake up in his own world again, and that things might have been complicated with the amount of time he's been comatose.. but that things will be alright in the end. That Jiang Cheng can be with his Sect again, fulfill his duty again.

But it's much harder to have that hope about her own situation by now.

"What if you don't exist anymore..? Then.." Madoka pauses. Her throat feels so tight that it's hard to talk, and her eyes grow watery.

Her hands shake. "Then what do you do..?"

Jiang Cheng might not be the best person to come to in situations like this; there's something awkward about him as he tries to adjust to the idea of her asking for advice from him, asking for some kind of kindness, some way of comforting her. He's never been good at that, more a pessimist than an optimist.

He leans back, frowning a little as he tries to find the right words.

"Does that mean you have to stop trying?" He shakes his head, trying not to let his hands fumble and fiddle with the things attached to his clothing, the toggles from his hoodie. His throat feels a little tight.

He glances over, hesitant.

"There are still people here that need you, aren't there? I know that it is hard, admitting the fact that there might not be something waiting, but if we focus on that then there's no point bothering with anything else. There's no point bothering with the missions, or our friends. And that isn't you."

He sighs, finally, rubbing a hand over his face.

"We can't change what we've done or what is ahead of us. We just have to work with what we have."

"But I can't stop thinking about it," she says. And then sniffs, like she's really, really struggling to not cry here.

But it's a fight she can't win. No matter how much Madoka tells herself to not cry right now, that Jiang Cheng is already having such a rough time as well and that she shouldn't let her own tears add to it.. She can't help it. She's only fifteen, and the weight of the world is just too much.

Which means that slowly, as she speaks..

"I-- I'm still doing my best. I do my best every time on the missions, and I try to do my best with the chores on the train, and I try to help out new people, but.."

.. the tears start rolling down her cheeks.

"B-But it hurts so much. And I'm so sad all the time. I.. I.." She sniffs, wiping a hand at her face, but new tears easily replace the tear stains she rubs away. "I thought things would get better if I'd just do my best, but it's like everything only gets worse.."

No matter what she does. Maybe that's the hardest part about it. Because it's nothing she can change through hard work, and Madoka isn't the type who can just accept things as they are. Who can't accept that the world is full of despair. That thought would be too overwhelming. It'd break her mind, leaving nothing of herself behind.

She just wants something to hope for. But it feels like there's nothing left after well over a year on this train.

"Sometimes it doesn't get better for a long time."

Jiang Cheng can't help thinking about the loss of his clan, his family, his friends - brother, sister, mother, father, all in the space of bare months. Sometimes it takes years for there to feel like some kind of hope on the horizon, some kind of reason to keep fighting. He had his Sect, the need to rebuilt it and make it strong, but being trapped here...

Reaching out, he gently wipes at her tears with the edge of his knuckle, careful and soft before he breathes out and tries to find the right words.

Pursing his lips, thoughtful, he hesitates before he speaks.

"Try your best out there with everyone else. It's what you do anyway so it won't be hard, right?" His hand hovers for a moment before it drops to her shoulder. She already trusts him enough to come here now, so... "Then whenever it is hard you can come here, or the quiet carriage, or to visit Lili with me. Then you can feel whatever you need to feel without worrying about anyone else."

As if it might be that easy, but...

"Then we can figure out some way to fix this problem. We'll figure it out."

Slowly she turns her gaze towards him. Her eyes are still watery, still full of tears, despite the ones that Jiang Cheng managed to brush away with his hands.

But at least Madoka is looking at him, rather than fully turning away. Even though she's still obviously in pain, still obviously crying, she's staring at him with her full, wide eyes.

".. you think so..?" It's a fragile question. But it sounds like she's willing to put stock into the idea, just because he's saying it.

"Do you really think.. we can figure it out..?"

It's still a little bit doubtful, because it feels like the more information Madoka gets about their situation, the less it feels like there's anything about it that could still really be fixed. But this is Jiang Cheng saying it. She puts so much faith in him. Sure, he might have his own trouble, but he's still very much a responsible adult. Not to mention that he wouldn't tell her this sort of thing if he didn't believe in it himself - or so Madoka thinks.

He's too caring for that.

"Even though everything is so messed up right now.. there's really some way that could make it okay again?"

Thank goodness he has experience with a-Ling or he would definitely feel more like running away from a crying child than comforting one. Unclehood has been good for him.

She's upset, but hopefully he is making it better. Hopefully he is doing something to ease some of the tension and pain in her heart - the sort of thing he's never been particularly good at doing himself. Years of pain and grief have left him somewhat broken inside, but he isn't passing that on to her.

"Of course. Would I say it if I didn't?" Jiang Cheng isn't the type of person to say things he doesn't mean at heart - especially not when emotion gets hold of him, or sourness overwhelms him.

It's easy, then, for his arm to wrap around her, to draw her closer, to offer her some physical comfort as he speaks; this is something he's used to as well, from late nights and dark dreams of parents long gone.

"We have you and me, and Wei Wuxian, who solved all the problems at home, and dozens of other people on the train with experience and studies. Why shouldn't we be able to figure it out?"

When he pulls her close, it's so incredibly easy to sink into the man's hold. Madoka just lets herself lean entirely against him. It's like a string that's been holding her up has snapped, and she collapses full on against him like a ragdoll, her full weight - which thankfully isn't much, with Madoka being such a small girl - leaning against him as she starts sobbing against Jiang Cheng, her shoulders moving up and down with each breath.

It's not that his words make things worse though, not at all. It's just that it always feels the safest to cry around a responsible adult, and particularly one who seems to care as much for her as Jiang Cheng does.

There's a reason Madoka sought him out in the first place, after all. Technically there were so many adults she could have gone to with these concerns, but right here, in Jiang Cheng's arms, is where it feels the safest to cry. The most okay place to cry.

"I hope so.." The girl manages to force out between the tears.

Because technically he's right. It's so hard to believe, since nothing has changed so far, but maybe there will be a way in the future - as scary as that is to think about without any hint of certainty.

"I-- I really want to make sure my parents are safe.. and my brother.. and everyone else, too.. I don't know if I can live with the thought of them being gone forever.."

Jiang Cheng is accustomed to the notion of being a fatherly figure thanks to his nephew and he uses that now; he lets Madoka lean against him, lets her curl into his side, and he lets himself stroke his hand over her back. It's familiar to him know, something he is used to, and he allows himself a moment to settle into it, to let himself feel that.

He isn't making everything better and he knows that - but he is helping. Isn't that enough for him now? Isn't it enough?

He can step in and be a father for her if she needs it; he can do that. It's not something he is unwilling to do. He is proud of her for even admitting the emotion, considering how loathe he is to do it for himself.

"I believe it," he nods his head, secure and clear.

After a moment, he breathes out.

"I understand," at least his brother is here, as is his nephew, people he cares about. He has that, which is more than other people - plus the knowledge that, once, Yanli had been here as well. "We will find a way. I promise you."

A promise. Madoka knows that they aren't worth much in a place like this. Not when anyone could disappear at any time. Heck, for all she knows, Jiang Cheng could be gone tomorrow, unable to ever fulfill his promise - not due to any fault of his own, but just because there are forces at play here that are way stronger than any of them.

But she still tries to embrace the promise in her heart all the same, if not just because she's aware the other does mean it.

So rather than questioning said promise, Madoka says something else entirely when she does speak up.

".. why do you think the train doesn't care about how our own worlds might not be in trouble..?"

She's mostly asking because she values his opinion. And because Jiang Cheng truly feels like a father figure. The exact person you can ask stuff like this to. The person you turn to when you're in need of guidance.

Jiang Cheng wants to do his best; he knows he could leave at any moment, just as Wen Qing and Wen Ning his done, as his sister had done, as other people he knows have. The platform could steal him away within a single sleep.

But he has to do his best. It's all he has ever been able to do and that isn't going to change any time soon.

Looking back down at Madoka he tilts his head, thoughtful for a moment. The train frustrates him beyond measure, but he has had time to think about it - he has had nothing but time here, sitting with his rabbit, with the quiet cabin, with his roommates. He can do nothing but think.

"I don't know," he says finally, breathing out. "Maybe one day we will go to someone's world and try to fix things, or we will stuck here forever. Even then we might be in a different world entirely."

He shakes his head, frown on his face.

"But we will keep learning. The more we learn the better judgements we can make."

"I've.. tried," she slowly says.

At least it feels a little bit more productive to talk about this than to just wallow in her own misery - especially since she's worried about dragging Jiang Chang down with her. He's already had such a rough time with life in general, the last thing Madoka would want to do is somehow make that worse.

"I talked to.. um. That person from the Ministry who was at the festival last month." Or rather, just a few days ago for them now, but the month did change on this very day. "Ten-Nank, that was their name, I think. Everything they said was a little confusing for me though. But I guess the very fact that it was confusing means that they do know a whole lot about the void.."

Since Madoka figures that's why she was so confused - because they weren't speaking on the same level of knowledge.

"I haven't spoken to any of them," Jiang Cheng shakes his head, letting himself think about it for a moment.

He might have been able to trust people better, a long time ago, but with betrayals and twisting thoughts and feelings over the years... He has been hurt and betrayed and damaged enough times. He has no reason to trust people he doesn't know and no reason to offer his trust to people on such flighty terms.

At least he lets himself consider it for a moment - he has no reason to trust the Ministry, whatever or whoever they are, no more than he trusts anyone who had brought him here.

"Are you sure you can trust what they say?" His voice is low, but soft. "They may have information for us, but that does not mean what they are telling us is accurate or even all that they have."

Madoka shakes her head. It's not a very decisive shake of her head though. Because no, she can't be sure they can trust them. But on the other hand, it's not like she can be sure that they can't trust them either.

So where does that leave them?

"I.. know that it might be naive," she admits. She's willing to admit it, especially in the face of Jiang Cheng, who might judge her for being naive, but at least wouldn't get mad about it in front of her, she thinks. "But if I don't at least try to trust them.. Then I don't know if there's any hope left."

And that would be even scarier than betrayal. Just the total lack of hope. Being left with nothing but despair about their current situation.

".. Besides.. the representative seemed really nice. They even adjusted the way they talked and their attitude when they seemed to realise I was having a hard time.."

It's not as if Jiang Cheng can make any commentary on that front; he had trusted and been betrayed and he had distrusted and been proven wrong. There's no way for him to change that, no way for him to go back and fix things - but he can keep moving forward. He's putting his faith in enough people now that he doesn't want to dwell on that too much.

There's a moment where he lets himself think about it, a long, drawn out thing, before he sighs and shakes his head.

"If you want to believe in them then believe. Who's to tell you anything other than that? It's what you feel. No one else should dictate that to you." He had been naïve, once, and foolish, and young. He had been broken by time - he doesn't want that for her.

He can't rip that from her.

"That's good," in his head he's thinking manipulative, but it's something to bring up with Wei Wuxian later. "Then we will learn more and we will find the answers. Even if it takes a long time."

".. huh..?"

It's not the last part she's surprised about. That very much makes sense, and Madoka would also really like to believe that they will slowly be able to gather more information about their situation through the Ministry - and potentially even be able to return home because of them in due time.

No, what surprises her is what Jiang Cheng said before that, leaving the girl with wide, surprised eyes.

"Do you.. really think that?" Listen, Madoka has dealt with overprotective people. And even more people who think her opinion shouldn't matter, just because she's young.

So to hear this from someone she sees as the Ultimate Responsible Adult - it's quite a lot.

"Is it really alright to go by my gut feeling? I.. I know it's not like I'm always right.." She frowns, unsure, and looks away.

"Would I say it if I didn't think it?"

Sometimes, trusting your gut is the best thing you can do; learning that had been a process. Jiang Cheng had become a Sect Leader at such a young age that all he had is what little he had managed to glean from his father and his own instinct to guide him. He had learned quickly that following his gut feelings was often a good guide to what he ought to do in the future.

Looking down at Madoka, he tilts his head.

"So what if you're wrong sometimes? That's how you grow up and learn. It is part of being a person, of learning how to be who you are meant to be. If anyone tells you they've done otherwise then they're probably lying anyway."

Look at him, growing and maturing and recognising himself for what he is. He has been through a great deal - he cannot deny that - but time has left him desperate to try and find some means of dealing with it all in the end.

It's so hard for Madoka herself to realise that this is growth on Jiang Cheng's part. After all, with the way she sees the other, it's hard to imagine him ever having been younger and perhaps having to deal with the same sort of insecurities that Madoka herself is dealing with at this age as well.

So instead of that, it feels more like sage advice that's being passed down to her. Like it's some sort of secret all adults share, and she's only getting to hear about it now.

"Well, I.. I guess that making mistakes is only human.." At least Madoka can admit as much, though she's really, really bad at ever applying that sort of statement to herself. "But trusting the wrong person can sometimes have really big consequences, you know..?"

That's why she's so worried about it. But she still seems more than willing to listen as she looks at him, trying to wipe away the last remainders of tears from the cheeks.

"Exactly." Not that Jiang Cheng has ever allowed himself the mere notion of being acceptable just as being human. No, to him he must always go above and beyond; he must attempt the impossible at every turn. It was how he was raised, what he was always told he had to do. It is what burned him from childhood and beyond.

At least he has the experience to help other people, now, and he's especially glad that he can do it for Madoka. She is important to him, special, even, and he can't deny it.

"You won't know unless you try," he says, voice low and careful. "And until you learn to trust what your heart and gut tells you then you'll never be able to grow."

What more can he say or do? He feels out of sorts from it, from remembering his own awkward failures.

".. okay," she slowly says. "I.. I want to try."

And despite the slight stammer in the way she says it, it sounds like the girl means it. She's not dismissing his advice. Especially since a part of her did want to trust the people of the Ministry already. Especially Ten-Nank, who had shown themself to be so kind to her when they spoke.

"But, then.. if I get into trouble because of it, and I can't solve it by myself.. Will you help me out?"

She stares at him, with her usual big eyes.

In reality, it's a question she feels like she already has the answer to. Can she rely on him? Of course she can. All the care he has shown her so far has proven as much.

"Whatever you need," Jiang Cheng nods, offering something that is almost akin to a smile before he glances away, looking around the room. There's no promise that he will be around long enough to keep this promise, that he will be kept on the train for the length of duty that it demands, but he can at least keep the faith of it.

He means it. Jiang Cheng wants to help Madoka in any way that he can, in the end.

Lifting his hand, he touches her head gently.

"I will be here for as long as I can. Only the train or my Sect would stop me, Madoka."

She does move a little when that hand lands on her head, but it's not a motion moving away from the hand in the slightest. Instead she might be moving just the tiniest bit towards it, just for the sake of the comfort.

"Thank you." She doesn't blame him for saying what might get in the way. None of them can help what the train does, and on the other hand, if Jiang Cheng ever gets the opportunity, he should definitely go back to his clan.

She wants him to be able to be with them again, after all.

"I'll make sure to remember that."

So hopefully it'll make her feel a bit better for now.

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we can probably wrap this one up here, if that's okay!