happyends: (of my frightened hands)
madoka kaname (鹿目 まどか) ([personal profile] happyends) wrote in [community profile] voidtreckerexpress2022-01-03 11:44 pm

(closed)

Who: Madoka and Jiang Cheng
When: Poi 1
Where: Jiang Cheng's cabin
What: Recent events have been troubling Madoka. What's better than seeking some comfort in dad hugs?
Warnings: Probably nothing.

Madoka figured that this feeling wouldn't just suddenly go away. After all, it's not like there's some sort of small matter she's troubled about. It's the fate of her entire world. Of her family. Of her friends. Of all the people in the entire world that she's let down by having been pulled into this place, rather than having been at the right place at the right moment to try and save them all.

.. and it's about her existence, too. If she got caught up in that destruction back home.. There's no way her body would have survived it, if it was comatose. And if her body is gone, then what is she by now..?

There's so many worries in her head. Even as she greets new people, as she talks to friends, as she figures out the new voting system.. She's worried.

It's like there's a pit in her stomach that she can't get rid of, and everything is sucked right into there. All her happiness. All her energy.

So even though Madoka hates to ask for help, she admits that maybe she has to in this case. Maybe she just has to get some comfort from someone, as much as she loathes to ask it. And while that decision is hard to make - the decision who to ask the comfort from isn't very hard in comparison. Once she finally makes her mind up, realising that maybe, just maybe it's okay to ask for some comfort, she finds her feet already guiding her in the direction of the cabin Jiang Cheng is staying in.

Madoka raises her hand slowly, knocking on the door. Once Jiang Cheng opens the door, he will find Madoka standing right there, looking incredibly dejected.

"Um.. sorry to bother you.."
fennu: (jiang33)

[personal profile] fennu 2022-02-04 11:44 pm (UTC)(link)
"I haven't spoken to any of them," Jiang Cheng shakes his head, letting himself think about it for a moment.

He might have been able to trust people better, a long time ago, but with betrayals and twisting thoughts and feelings over the years... He has been hurt and betrayed and damaged enough times. He has no reason to trust people he doesn't know and no reason to offer his trust to people on such flighty terms.

At least he lets himself consider it for a moment - he has no reason to trust the Ministry, whatever or whoever they are, no more than he trusts anyone who had brought him here.

"Are you sure you can trust what they say?" His voice is low, but soft. "They may have information for us, but that does not mean what they are telling us is accurate or even all that they have."
fennu: (tu11296)

[personal profile] fennu 2022-02-06 08:32 pm (UTC)(link)
It's not as if Jiang Cheng can make any commentary on that front; he had trusted and been betrayed and he had distrusted and been proven wrong. There's no way for him to change that, no way for him to go back and fix things - but he can keep moving forward. He's putting his faith in enough people now that he doesn't want to dwell on that too much.

There's a moment where he lets himself think about it, a long, drawn out thing, before he sighs and shakes his head.

"If you want to believe in them then believe. Who's to tell you anything other than that? It's what you feel. No one else should dictate that to you." He had been naïve, once, and foolish, and young. He had been broken by time - he doesn't want that for her.

He can't rip that from her.

"That's good," in his head he's thinking manipulative, but it's something to bring up with Wei Wuxian later. "Then we will learn more and we will find the answers. Even if it takes a long time."
fennu: (jc-16)

[personal profile] fennu 2022-02-08 10:56 pm (UTC)(link)
"Would I say it if I didn't think it?"

Sometimes, trusting your gut is the best thing you can do; learning that had been a process. Jiang Cheng had become a Sect Leader at such a young age that all he had is what little he had managed to glean from his father and his own instinct to guide him. He had learned quickly that following his gut feelings was often a good guide to what he ought to do in the future.

Looking down at Madoka, he tilts his head.

"So what if you're wrong sometimes? That's how you grow up and learn. It is part of being a person, of learning how to be who you are meant to be. If anyone tells you they've done otherwise then they're probably lying anyway."

Look at him, growing and maturing and recognising himself for what he is. He has been through a great deal - he cannot deny that - but time has left him desperate to try and find some means of dealing with it all in the end.
fennu: (015)

[personal profile] fennu 2022-02-12 03:24 pm (UTC)(link)
"Exactly." Not that Jiang Cheng has ever allowed himself the mere notion of being acceptable just as being human. No, to him he must always go above and beyond; he must attempt the impossible at every turn. It was how he was raised, what he was always told he had to do. It is what burned him from childhood and beyond.

At least he has the experience to help other people, now, and he's especially glad that he can do it for Madoka. She is important to him, special, even, and he can't deny it.

"You won't know unless you try," he says, voice low and careful. "And until you learn to trust what your heart and gut tells you then you'll never be able to grow."

What more can he say or do? He feels out of sorts from it, from remembering his own awkward failures.
fennu: (150)

[personal profile] fennu 2022-02-14 08:17 pm (UTC)(link)
"Whatever you need," Jiang Cheng nods, offering something that is almost akin to a smile before he glances away, looking around the room. There's no promise that he will be around long enough to keep this promise, that he will be kept on the train for the length of duty that it demands, but he can at least keep the faith of it.

He means it. Jiang Cheng wants to help Madoka in any way that he can, in the end.

Lifting his hand, he touches her head gently.

"I will be here for as long as I can. Only the train or my Sect would stop me, Madoka."