voidtreckerexpress | Look, a book! [OPEN]

Who: Zetta, minions, Prinnies, and hapless others
What: Zetta around the train.
Where: The garden car and the game car.
When: Domino 19.
Warnings: Zetta?

The Garden Car

Visitors to the garden car, no matter when, always endure the same ritual: a greeting by a curious woman, armed with a sword and apparently of the opinion that wide belts were perfect substitutes for shirts. With a rather vapid smile, she simply said, "Welcome to the domain of the Overlord."

Inside the garden car, as always, milled a half-dozen people with the same vapid cheer as the girl outside. Some of them were even walking in place, living up to their role as NPCs. A couple of others had the engine of a beat-up old truck half out, while from beneath said engine a pair of legs kicked futilely. Slight technical problems, don't mind that. And in the center of it all, atop a small mound of stones, floated a book -- who was yelling at three patchwork, peg-legged penguin things.

"I told you to steal a proper throne, damn it!"

Fun and Games

"Hyaaaha ha ha ha ha!"

Possibly the weirdest sight to date: a floating book with a VR headset rather haphazardly strapped on, cackling maniacally as a minion listened to his orders and relayed inputs on a controller.

"Yes! Ram the hero into the tree again! Five hit points down every time! Stupid hero, how dare you try to save the day?! This is what you deserve!"

Yes, Zetta was taking great joy in stupidly suiciding the young adventurer out to save the day. After all, humiliating heroes was part of his duty as an Overlord!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"Dood!" the Prinny exclaimed, taking the plate with obvious delight.

This caught the attention of a book, who spun around to glare at the scene.
"Hey! Are you feeding my minions?"

Reigen couldn't help but softly chuckle at how happy the Prinny is at the food, then looked at the book's glare, not seeming phased.

"Uh, yeah. I owed this one a lunch." Sorry Zetta, while Reigen was doing his best to see you as an equal you are also a book.

"No you don't! Prinnies do horrible chores for less than minimum wage, including food!"

That may be academic, as the Prinny was already wolfing down the meal.

"Are you serious? No wonder these guys are so easy to bribe. You gotta give your employees better incentives, Pinocchio-san."

Reigen was not much to talk since he barely pays his fourteen-year-old intern, but that was more of a work and life experience thing! And he pays his adult employee fine!

"...Okay, if it's a bribe, it's different, but normally you don't do that in front of the authority figure who would not want the Prinny to take a bribe." Seriously, come on.

Ok, maybe admitting right to someone's face that he bribed his employees wasn't the smartest thing. "Ha, very observant! Guess you really are an overlord! ...seriously though, I'm not trying to lead your penguin buddies in a rebellion or anything. We're cool."

"Huh. That's a first." Usually sedition and rebellion are the first things on anyone's mind. "Just a heads-up. Prinnies are supposed to suffer."

Hey, Reigen's actually got pretty normal goals, and none involve overlord overthrowing. He's fine obtaining attention through his usual means of psychic cons and the like, thanks.

"Huh? Why, because they're like human souls or whatever? ...why'd you make them look so cute then?"

"That's how they come, they're consistent all over the cosmos. Except the ones in Celestia have tiny angel wings instead of tiny bat wings, but that's obvious." Of course it was obvious....

"-! See, that's what I'm saying! You guys can't give them cute little wings then tell me they have to be bullied!"

Arataka Reigen says Prinny Rights, apparently.

"Yes I can! Look, I'll demonstrate how this works. Pick one up." Preferably the Prinny that was even now leaning its head back, looking way too happy at its full belly, but any of them will do.

"Ok...come here, little buddy..." Reigen, confused but still a curious shmuck, picked up Blue like the Prinny was a small puppy. "What does this have to do with anything?"

"Now toss it." Zetta twitched one corner of his cover off to a clear area. Hearing this suggestion, the Prinny went very still. Dood, Reigen wouldn't do that to it, would he...?

"What?! Why would I do that?!" Reigen holds Blue a little more protectively, baffled that he's even been asked to do that. Seriously, what the hell?

"Oh? You're saying murderers, thieves, and those who lived worthless lives should be coddled in the afterlife, instead of given the chance to earn their way to rebirth?" Zetta fixed Reigen with a surprisingly piercing stare, for a stupid book that had no visible ocular structures.

Oh, Reigen had nearly forgot about that whole situation. Curse you, Prinnies, taking advantage of his weakness for tiny animals!

"Of course not! Redemption is something all people need to work for! It's just, uh...not all crimes are created equal!" Maybe Reigen was a little soft, not that he'd ever admit it. He changed the way he's holding Blue so the Prinny had to look him in the eye.

"Blue. Be straight with me, little buddy. What did you do to turn out like this? You didn't kill a man, right?"

Of the color trio, Blue was the smartest. Red or Green might have blown their opportunity, but Blue jumped at it with both peg-legs!

"No way, dood! I'm as innocent as can be!"

Of course, he was also sweating nervously as his eyes darted back and forth. No one could claim Blue was a good liar.

"They don't remember," Zetta said impatiently.

Reigen crouched down and set Blue down on the ground again...only to lightly slap the Prinny upside the head.

"At least look me in the eyes when you're lying, idiot! You're in a plush soul jar!"

It was still very hard to be mean to tiny penguins, but Reigen tried to keep a straight face. "I'm letting you off easy this time. Don't commit more crimes or else." With a small huff to pretend he was being harsh, he looked back to Zetta. "Is tossing them some alternative to docking their pay? Do they get paid in reincarnation points or something?"

"Oh no, it's just pure comedy really." Zetta was extremely disappointed. Watching Blue explode would have been hilarity for all concerned. "Netherworld Prinnies need to earn enough money to get resurrected, by working miserable jobs for terrible pay."

Blue, meanwhile, flailed a bit at the slap. I work for the Overlord, dood! What exactly is the plan here to not commit crimes? Demons are evil by nature!"

"So literally paying your way to be reborn, huh? Sounds miserable." Reigen figured that being a corporate slave was a hellish enough punishment, but maybe that was just his own experiences with that system.

Back to arguing with a little penguin though. "There's a difference! If you beat up someone just because you feel like hurting them, it's a crime! If you do it because they're getting in the way of your job, it's collateral damage! Only be evil on the clock!"

That sounded like fair demon logic to him.

"Heh. Nice thinking," the book said with a smirk. Of course, Prinnies, much like Inspector Gadget, were ALWAYS on duty -- but no reason to mention that now. "It's supposed to be miserable work. That's all part of the cycle."

Perhaps surprisingly, Zetta did respect the cycle of reincarnation and the flow of souls. Maintaining that was part of an Overlord's job, inasmuch as they weren't supposed to do things that deliberately screwed it up.

Look, a book! [OPEN]

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