voidtreckerexpress | (open) i don't know how to word it

Who: Inigo and you!
When: Fiddlesticks 27
Where: Sleeper carriages, luggage carriage
What: Inigo loses a boyfriend.
Warnings: None, just a very sad Inigo.

( scenario a - sleeper carriages )

Maybe you've already noticed it, but something about Inigo today seems.. off. Or at least, extra off, considering Inigo has already seemed to be acting more strangely than usually the past few days, especially since the day of the party.

But today? Today things have seemed to reach a fever pitch. Maybe you're worried enough to go check up on him, in which case you might find the guy in one of the hallways of the sleeper carriages, near his room. If you bother to ask him what's up though, he'll just laugh.

"What? No, I'm fine! Of course I'm fine, what could po--"

That's the exact moment he turns to head into his room to try and hide from this conversation, only to forget to scan his ticket. Which means he's just walking head-first into the door, causing him to topple over to the ground.

It's fine. He's fine. This is fine.

( scenario b - luggage carriage )

Inigo is trying really hard to carry on as usually. Really, he is. Because that's just what he does. He's not someone who sits around and mopes. Sure, the circumstances here may be different than the ones back home, but old habits are hard to give up, and Inigo's oldest and most stubborn habit is definitely the thought running through his mind that he has to be okay. He has to be strong. So despite the moments where he slips up and seems off, he tries so hard to laugh. And joke. As if nothing is up.

As if he doesn't feel like his heart has been torn straight out of his body.

But it's so hard to keep it up all the time. At least the shower is a good place to cry, but when Inigo finds it occupied exactly at the moment he needs it, he quickly tries to look for another place. He knows nowhere on the train is safe to hide from everyone, but he figures the luggage carriage is at least the furthest out of the way. It's the only option right now. It's either that, or crying in the middle of the train.

Which is why if you happen to be in the luggage carriage - or went looking for him everywhere only to end up here - you may find Inigo sitting on top of some suitcases. His knees are drawn up to his chest, and although that makes it impossible to see his face from the current angle, the telltale sounds of sobs are probably all anyone needs to see what's going on here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Is Inigo looking hunted better than him looking depressed? She can't decide. Instead, she adjusts her grip to be more comfortable for both of them. Here's where her training as security personnel shines, because short of wrestling her, he's not getting out.

Unfortunately for him, it's the perfect storm of the fact that she was there for his embarrassing declaration of adoration for Yuki Sohma, along with her checking the roster daily. She doesn't want to hurt him, but she also doesn't want to watch him pretend everything's fine.

"And your boyfriend up and vanishing has nothing to do with it?"

She might be wrong, and she's ready to apologise if she is.

It feels like a punch to the gut.

Not that he blames Lightning. No, if anything, it's.. actually oddly nice on her part. After all, she put those puzzle pieces together without him mentioning anything about it. And if she knew that, she must have come here since she was actually worried about him. Knowing people worry about him is.. a weird feeling, for sure, but he has no time to wrestle with it or really think it over when he has to provide a reply in this situation and he has no idea what the hell it's supposed to be.

He could tell the truth, but it'd be painful. And he might just drag her mood down along with his own, which is what he's desperately trying to avoid here. Or he could lie, but he's pretty sure she'd catch onto the truth anyway. It feels like a game where he can only lose.

His gaze shifts, unable to hold hers, and for a moment he looks smaller than he actually is.

"So you saw, huh." There's a hint of resignation in his voice. He can't talk his way out of this one anymore, although he can try to maybe make it seem less bad than it is. "I.. Well. It's quite alright, really." No, it's not. "He already rejected me. So I suppose it's much better for him to not be here, where he constantly has to see my face."

She doesn't exactly shake him by the scruff of his neck, but the way her fingers tighten against his shirt, she's at least considering it. Her gaze is sharp as she watches him decide whether or not to tell the truth - or whatever he's thinking so hard about - and when he starts talking, she very distinctly doesn't breathe a sigh of relief that he didn't just shut her down.

He could, of course, but maybe he doesn't realise that.

"What d'you mean, rejected?" Her tone indicates that if Yuki was still around, she'd be picking a fight about it... which she realises, and tries, badly, to modulate into more concern. "You had a fight?"

"I.." He instinctively starts answering this time, seemingly without thinking. It's mostly since her tone catches him off guard so much - he's not quite sure what to make of it. She almost seems angry, and Inigo isn't quite sure why. (Mostly because he's an idiot who can't seem to get it through his thick skull that people might actually care about him.)

But since his brain is very much distracted with trying to figure out what that tone was, his mouth speaks without filter.

"He suddenly walked away from me during the party from a while ago. While I was.. I was talking about our relationship."

Ugh. Dramatics are the worst. Which, she understands makes her a hypocrite, but no one's around who can call her on it. So. The worst. She rests her free hand on her hip, and considers.

"Sounds to me like you had some kinda misunderstanding, and then he went and got spirited away before you got a chance to work it out."

Not that she knows what that's like, or anything! "Doesn't sound like a rejection to me."

Lightning is - as usually when it comes to their conversations, really - entirely right.

But try getting that through to Inigo's dumb brain. No way that's going to work when he's already so quick to assume people dislike him. Due to his nerves he doesn't quite know where to leave his hands, and ends up awkwardly scratching his arm.

"I don't know." That's Inigo-speak for 'uh no, I'm pretty sure I'm right', but ssh. "He didn't want to tell me what was wrong. And now I might never know."

"Him and every other teenager in the universe," she agrees, voice thick with self-irony. Even though he's probably going to scarper, she lets him go - after pushing him until he's facing her.

"Next question. Did you say anything you regret?"

It's a tempting thought. Trying to run away now. He's pretty fast, he could probably make it if he was smart enough about it. And this is starting to feel more and more like he's being interrogated by some enemy, except it's an interrogation about the worst possible subject - his own feelings.

And yet somehow he can't. It's like his feet have been nailed down to the ground.

It's not fear though. If he thinks about it, it's just.. he doesn't want to make her feel bad by suddenly running away from her. It wouldn't be fair to her, no matter how cornered he feels right now.

So Inigo just answers, a redness starting to creep up his cheeks in shame.

".. yes." He's even being honest. "But just because of the way he reacted. If I would have known he would suddenly get all awkward, I wouldn't have said a thing."

She appreciates that he's sticking around more than he knows. Etro knows she would've scarpered long before this. Probably broken something trying it, too.

"So, basically, a misunderstanding." Her flippancy melts away, until only the concern remains. He really does look terrible; she wishes she knew what to say to make it right. But what he needs is to resolve things with Yuki, and... well, that choice has been taken from him.

They've only been apart for a moment, but her hands raise of their own accord, back to his shoulders. She keeps her touch light, and not restricting. "Inigo, I'm sorry. You don't deserve to have this happen to you."

Deserve.

If there's any word Inigo has ever had difficulty with, it's that one. He kind of wants to shrink away under those hands on his shoulders. Or let the ground swallow him up or something. What does he deserve? He has no idea. He's getting so used to the idea of rejection that it feels like maybe that's just what he deserves at this point. For being a disappointment.

But for as much as he's already laid bare here, he doesn't want to add that to it. Not right now. So rather than verbally dismissing it, he manages to give Lightning a look that's half-surprise, half-sad.

"Thank you. That's.. kind of you to say." Though difficult to deal with. "I'm sure I'll be fine in time, so.. no need to worry about me."

"I'll worry anyway," she says, almost dismissive about it. Just one more thing to worry about, in this mess they're in. Nothing she can't handle. "That's what friends do."

She releases him a second time, and takes a step back. A physical disengage; her hands, free, come to rest on her hips as she ducks her head. "Just... be kind to yourself. Please?"

He opens his mouth.

Then closes it again.

What does he even say to that? No, before he decides that.. does he even respond to that with the truth or a lie? It's so hard to tell which would be better at this point, and the fact he's so emotionally worked up sure isn't helping matters.

Inigo is pretty sure he can't tell the truth here without absolutely bursting out into tears, so instead he weakly laughs.

"I wasn't being unkind to myself, that was entirely the door's fault!"

(open) i don't know how to word it

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lightning is speedrunning this sympathy thing

hey this is light and welcome to my friendship with inigo let's play, he hasn't cried yet!