voidtreckerexpress | (no subject)

Entry tags:

(no subject)

Who: Duo and Bucky
Where: Quiet Carriage
When: Grasshopper, Day 12 (the return to the train after the mission)
What: Bucky's attempt to bring Duo down.
Warnings: No idea yet, honestly!

Somehow Duo managed to get back to the train in one piece and even managed to get to into a shower before everyone started swarming. He could easily have stayed in the shower for an hour or more, but he knew that people would be needing them way more than him. He stayed in long enough to get the worst of the grime off of him and out of his hair (though knew he'd need to wash it again later that day), careful of the tender lump on the side of his head, and changed his clothes.

Once he was done, he headed quickly to his cabin... and paused. With a sigh he slipped in, grabbed some things, and headed out and to one of the quiet rooms.

He slipped into an empty one and sat himself on the table, legs crossed, and slowly started to brush out his hair as he considered his options.

How long had he gone without sleep now? Too long... Alice had knocked him out to stop him doing something stupid. She's actually knocked him the hell out. If that didn't tell him something was wrong he didn't know what did. But he also knew he just couldn't do it. It had been so long now that the idea of settling down and closing his eyes filled him with a fear that had no basis in reality. Duo barely remembered why he was so afraid. Surely by now it would be okay?

And yet, there he was, dark, dark circles under his eyes, pale and draw and lacking the energy to even drag his brush through his damp hair.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Bucky is in full mother-hen mode, looking after people and making sure they've had their wounds tended, gotten some food in their bellies, and been tucked in if they needed it. He's used to reckless idiots who don't know how to recognize their own limits, at least.

So when he sees Duo, just sitting there with wet hair, he recognizes the fatigue. He gives the door a little knock with his knuckle before he pulls it open with a small smile. "You look like shit," he says warmly. "Want me to brush your hair out?"

Duo stopped what he was doing when the door opened and he frowned at Bucky, taking a few seconds to work out what he was asking before giving a tired laugh.

"Sure, why the hell not...?" How many people had seen him with his hair down now? How many people had brushed his hair? He'd gone 16 years and only two people had ever done that. Himself and Sister Helen. Then he gets on this weird ass train and everyone wants to have a go. It was very funny to Duo.

Duo held out his brush to Bucky. "... And also... hey. That's not nice to say." He just realised Bucky had insulted his looks. Duo pouted.

He laughs softly as he takes the brush, sitting down next to Duo and gathering the hair up in one hand, starting to brush at the tips. "Consider it a mental acuity check," he replied lightly. "Which you failed miserably, by the way. You goin' to sleep after the hair's all taken care of?"

For someone who didn't have hair all that long himself, he seemed to actually know what the hell he was doing with all that hair, carefully teasing out snarls as he worked his way up.

"Not fair... You can't go jumpin things like that on a guy." Duo was still, aside from a little shift around so that Bucky could better reach his hair. It was so strange having someone doing it for him, but not entirely unpleasant. And Bucky was gentle so that was a plus.

"Nope." He gave a small shake of his head. "Thought about it. But decided nah, I'm good."

"If you're ready for it, it wouldn't be accurate," he replies lightly, shaking his head a little as he works the brush slowly up the waterfall of hair. "You're gonna learn that lesson the hard way too, huh? How badly do you react when you're woken up by a stranger?"

Duo shrugged.

"... Hurt a friend last time it happened. Haven't tried it yet here." Because that was a risk he just didn't want to take. What if he really hurt someone? They'd punish him, right? They'd have to.

Bucky grunts quietly, still carefully working the brush through Duo's hair. "When I was tryin' not to sleep, I was nodding off all over the place, and ended up accidentally tossing people halfway across a train car. I'm real lucky the worst injury was a bruised cheek. Lucky for me, I wasn't the first soldier on the train and Inigo managed to show me how to sleep without putting other people at risk."

"... Alice knocked me out, if that helps? Is that what Inigo did to you?" It was said as a joke, mostly. But Duo didn't have the energy to do much more than toss a smile over his shoulder at Bucky.

Sleep wasn't something he normally had issues with really. Stupid dreams were common. But the inability to sleep, the fear, that was a rare thing. He could count on one hand how many times it had happened and... honestly, the fix had been different every time.

"How... How did you learn to sleep, then?"

Huffing out a laugh, Bucky shakes his head. "No, he's more gentle than that," he flashes a little grin, the expression fading to a soft smile at the last question.

"He taught me to stop trying to do it alone," he admits. "He dragged me off to bed and climbed in right with me. Having another body up against mine helps me feel safe enough that when I wake up I'm not in fight or flight." He slides the brush through Duo's hair, nearly high enough up to reach the scalp. "If you pass out in public, I'll to the same to you," it's half a warning and half an offer.

Duo just frowned. That didn't sound like a smart thing to do. When he woken from those kinds of dreams, he was in fight mode only. Flight went out the window. He chewed on the inside of his cheek for a moment, considering his options as best his tired mind could do... "I don't know the guy. I don't think he's gonna wanna slide into bed with me if the risk is I try and murder him in his sleep."

And then he hissed softly, his hand lifting to cover the back of his head. "... Ouch. Watch the lump." He really hadn't been joking when he'd said Alice had knocked him out. Her teapot was a lot heavier than he would have given it credit for.

"Yeah, the fact that you think it'd deter him makes it pretty clear you don't know him," Bucky chuckles warmly, but cuts it off when Duo hisses.

"Sorry. I'm gonna feel around it to make sure I don't hit it again," he warns, and uses his flesh hand to do just that, careful not to press any harder than he has to, to know where the lump is, then goes back to brushing and carefully avoids it. "Anyway," he jumps back to the original topic of conversation. "I meant that I was going to do it myself, not send him after you. Besides, if you got hit that hard you probably have a concussion and the best treatment for those is sleep."

Duo knew the guys face, name and had seen him around. But he'd never had the chance to actually talk to him yet. It had always been on his list to meet with those he hadn't, but with how many people were on the train, he just couldn't keep up. There were just too many people.

He held himself still then, eyes closed as Bucky felt around for the lump so he could avoid it before returning to brushing his hair.

"I thought the best treatment was not to sleep." Duo shot back with a low laugh. "But you're mad if you wanna risk playin cuddle buddies with me, Bucky, my dude." He was about to say he was stronger than he looked, but when he thought about it, he was so tired he could barely keep his head up.

"That used to be what they thought, but it turns out if you're bleeding into your skull, you get a nasty headache that'll wake you up," Bucky replies with a little grin. "And I'm a literal super-soldier, I've got both the strength and the reflexes to defend myself if I need to." And he has the sense to know the difference between a malicious attack and someone who's just been startled awake.

He runs the brush through Duo's hair one last time, then threads his fingers through it, carefully braiding it up, just the way Duo normally does. He's careful, again, not to tug on the hair, especially the third that's connected to that lump of his.

"Hn..." Okay, it made sense, but he guessed old habits died hard. It was easier to just stay awake. But he couldn't really argue with that now could he?

He was quiet while Bucky braided his hair, and pulled the band from around his wist to hold it over his shoulder for him to tie off the end for him. No point in half-assing the job.

"... Alright. How about it's just plain weird to think about sleeping next to anyone, even when I'm not... slowly losing my mind."

Bucky huffs out a laugh as he accepts the hair tie and secures the braid. "Oh, it's super weird the first few times, but once you get used to it, it's downright pleasant. That's why you'll see me sleeping next to him all over the place," he admits with a sheepish grin, tossing the completed braid tail back over Duo's shoulder. "At first it feels weirdly intimate, then there's the stage where you expect pain all the time, until something shifts upstairs," he taps his temple, "and all the sudden it's just comfortable. Like a hot shower."

Duo caught at his braid when it was tossed over his shoulder and then shifted on the table so he was more facing Bucky. He probably should sit on the chair, it's what they were for after all.

He was quiet for a long moment just staring him down in his tired way. And then sighed.

"... What do I gotta do?"

Bucky shrugs his wide shoulders. "Well, I don't know if it's important, but the first time Inigo did it with me, it was in my own bed. Home turf, if you will. So I suppose we should go to your room, if you're comfortable with that. Or we could sleep right here, I'm not picky." He never had any trouble getting to sleep himself, even in the worst of circumstances.

Duo thought about his cabin. He had bad luck with roommates, none of them currently were the same ones he had when he'd boarded the train. And the two new ones he'd not even met yet, due to his... condition. So at this point he'd rather sleep on a bed of nails than go and sleep in his own bed surrounded by strangers doing something that didn't completely sit right with him.

His eyes closed for a moment as he tried to recall the layout and names of Bucky's own cabin and roommates, and he just couldn't. It was finally all catching up with him.

"Here... here is fine. Or your place, if you think it's safe. Not mine." So so so not his.

"I've only got one roommate right now, but I don't know her very well. Here's probably the safest option. On the table or under it?" He asks as he reaches over to the door to flip the lock into place. There's not exactly a lot of privacy, but at least they'll have substantial warning if someone else tries to get in.

If only he has the tools to break into one of the empty cabins... Not that he thought for a second that he'd be allowed entrance, but it would be better than this.

Duo looked at the glass door, then the table he was already sat upon, and heaved a sigh. "Guess I've slept in worse places..."

The comment gets an amused snort. "I've slept in much worse places. But the door's locked, so if anyone tries to get in the racket'll wake us up, at least," he says lightly, and he slides onto the table, managing to fit his not-exactly-small frame on just half the table top. "You want the soft arm or the metal one for a pillow?"

"Pillow?" Duo... did not squeak. He was very manly in his reply. The manliest. Even if his eyes were wide watching Bucky lie down on the table beside him. It took a great deal of Duo's effort to not launch himself off, make excuses and run out of the room.

He gulped and gave a small shake of his head, the only movement he made. "... I... guess... soft?" Though the metal arm didn't bother him. How many times had he slept in Deathsycthe? The cool feel of metal was not something that bothered him in the slightest. And if he did close his eyes... he knew he could actually sleep on a bed of nails and not have a second thought.

Bucky's smart enough to pretend like there was no squeak at all, and simply nods when Duo gives him an answer, shifting onto his right side and extending his arm out. He pats the table with his metal hand, and winces slightly at the sharp clang it makes.

He knows there aren't many people on the train that're unnerved by his metal arm, but that doesn't stop him from being bothered by it.

It takes Duo a few seconds of more wide eyed staring before he finally moves. He shifted forward, uncurling his legs to stretch them out and slowly drops back to lay his head upon Bucky's arm. And almost jumped back up again.

It was one thing to accidentally fall asleep with or on someone. But to do it deliberately? Even back home if there was just the one bed he'd end up taking the couch or the floor.

But he made himself stay put. Even if he was tense. He didn't know how he was ever going to fall asleep like this. And he didn't understand why he was like this. He knew Bucky well enough. He was a good guy. Friendly. Funny. He'd been good to him so far. Was this really such a weird thing? Duo's mind screamed yes, but he knew he was just being dramatic.

"S-so I just...close my eyes and sleep, right?"

If it wasn't so sad that Duo was skittish about this, it would've been endearing. Cute, even. "That's it," he replied quietly. "If you need to focus on something to keep your mind from wandering, use your own heartbeat."

His breathing was steady and even, and though he isn't snuggled up to Duo's side the way he would be with Inigo, he's plenty close enough for his body heat to be felt. "I'll watch your back," he promised, voice barely above a whisper.

Duo would have been rather unhappy to be thought of as 'cute' when he was feeling so very, very uncute. He closed his eyes and did his best to do as Bucky suggested. He focused on his own heartbeat.... which was a stupid idea since his own heartbeat was not steady or even.

He did trust Bucky. He knew he'd have his back. And he trusted the idiot would be able to defend himself should Duo do something stupid...

Thinking that, though, was helping him slowly relax.

"... Thanks, Gramps..." Duo smiled tiredly.

"G'night, whippersnapper," Bucky replies, and closes his eyes to let himself drift off.

They might be starting out with some space between them, but Bucky is a snuggler, and at some point during their nap, he ends up shifting closer.

Duo was, at his core, a very tactile person. Deep inside he craved touch, human contact, warmth... any kind of affection. He was starved for it. Had only experienced it once in his life only to have it snatched away just as he was getting used to it. Maybe that's why he was so afraid of getting close to people? At least people like Bucky.

Alice was safe. Alice didn't want affection and didn't give it. Being friends with her was great, there were no expectations. It was the same with Najaran and Kitty. But people who touched, who liked to hug, who offered warmth... They're the ones who would hurt him the most, and he knew it.

And yet... he fell asleep. Knowing that Bucky could hurt him more than he could ever hurt Bucky be damned. He allowed himself to be lulled into sleep, fell into that darkness... and didn't dream. For all the fear that he would suffer nightmares the moment he closed his eyes, Duo didn't actually dream. Nor did he wake. At least not until he felt a body at his back. It was touch that had his eyes snapping open. But rather than triggering the fight response he had been afraid of, Duo immediately rolled away and off of the table, blindly reaching for a weapon that just wasn't there... not even fully awake yet to realise that there wasn't actually a thread to shoot even if he did have one.

Bucky isn't in an entirely different boat, but he's more willing to trust than Duo is. He was born into a world of touch and love and warmth before Hydra had gotten their hands on him, and though he'd spent years with his only physical contact involving pain, he knew in his bones that there was safety and comfort in touch. So he's trying to reclaim that touchy-feely part of himself, and it was a whole lot easier than he's willing to admit.

He's under no illusions that Duo feels safe with him -- he knows that's not something easily earned from guys like them, so he sleeps lightly enough that when Duo moves, his eyes blink open and his shoulders tense, ready for an attack that never comes. After a few seconds, he blinks a couple more times. "Sorry," he murmurs, realizing what must've happened. "I guess I'm too used to napping with Inigo, and he'll wrap around you the second you're out," he chuckles.

Duo stared blindly up at the man on the table from his position on the floor near the door. He heard the words but didn't follow them. He couldn't understand what was being said. But it was the laughter, low as it was, that tickled something of his senses and Duo blinked. Finally he seemed to wake up and realise what he was doing and who he was looking at... and his cheeks warmed.

"I... I'm sorry." He gasped out, thoroughly embarrassed with himself.

The smile Bucky offers him is a warm one, and he gives his head a shake. "No need to apologize," he replies softly. "Everybody on this train is screwed up in their own special way. You okay now?" he offers his flesh hand, to help Duo back to his feet. "For example, I won't use the ICPs if video is activated. I'll barely even touch the stupid vending machines."

Still looking embarrassed with himself, Duo reaches up and takes the hand, letting Bucky pull him to his feet.

"... Why the hell're you being so nice, man? I'm a basket case." Alright, maybe on a good day he could probably pass as normal. He knew he should probably cut himself a break, sleep deprivation was a hell of a thing, but Duo wasn't really ready to do that.

Bucky shrugs and flashes a grin. "I did the whole cold, ruthless assassin thing for a few decades and decided it wasn't for me," just as soon as he'd had the free will to do so. "I've decided to become a flower child and sing kumbaya in a field of wild grasses rolling in the wind. Until we come across a place like that, I guess I'll just settle for being nice."

Duo just stared... and then he started laughing... a little too hard. He quickly shut it off. He knew where that would lead if he wasn't careful and as nice as Bucky was, the last thing he needed was Duo clinging to him and sobbing like some idiot child.

"... Right... right." Okay, weird image if a hippy Bucky aside, Duo was still exhausted. And now just too damn exhausted to be embarrassed. So, he climbed back up onto the table and just stretched out. "... Gramps is a hippy. Who knew?"

Bucky lowers himself to the table again, offering his arm as a pillow and this time lying on his back instead of his side, so he'd be less likely to try to curl around the poor kid again. "Well, I'd be a drunk hobo but I can't get drunk, and that's just one step away from a hippy, so..." he shrugs his shoulders, the metal one clanking quietly against the table beneath him.

Duo snorted and easily dropped his head onto Bucky's arm.

"Can't get drunk? Damn, that must suck..." He felt for the guy. Not that he'd often get drunk himself. He could count on one hand the amount of time's he'd been that way.

Duo was still for a moment... And then with deliberate, conscious movements, he shimmied himself back a bit, until his back was flush to Bucky's side. Honestly, he didn't mind how close the guy was. It had just surprised him when he'd been asleep, not being prepared and all that. Now he knew. And he guess it was something of a peace offering. To show that maybe he wasn't a lost cause after all?

"Well, it at least kept me from crawling into a bottle and letting myself die there, so there's that." He probably would have, if he'd been able. His first weeks of freedom had been rough, to say the least, and his life skills had been almost nonexistent.

He smiles, just a little, when Duo snuggles up against him. "Sleep tight," he says warmly, closing his eyes to do the same.

"Amen to that..." Duo could understand that temptation, and he didn't have nearly as many years under his belt as Bucky did. But he was glad neither of them had succumbed to that.

He closed his own eyes and nodded, his cheek rubbing along Bucky's arm when he did.

"Uh-huh... G'night..." Duo yawned and settled himself down. And was asleep in moments.

Bucky smiles warmly at that little cheek rub, but he knows better than to say anything about it. Instead, he lets himself drift off and this time, he stays put.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only