(closed) a secret is only a secret when it is unspoken to another

[irrationally]

Who: Alice and Crowley
When: Horseshoe 13
Where: The greenhouse
What: It's time to talk bonds.
Warnings: Nothing so far, will edit!

It's not as if this hasn't been on Alice's mind before. But with the mission suddenly cutting in, all her focus has been on that the past few days - if not just to make sure certain people who can't seem to go without babysitter supervision were alright.

But now she's back on the train with more spare time, Alice figures it's finally time to talk about all these odd sensations she's been having recently. At first it was easy to attribute it to her own mind still being nowhere near normal people's, but the more she started to feel the odd sensations, the more it felt.. odd. Not like her usual brain oddities. It felt different. Like it was coming from outside of her.

And honestly, assuming it might have something to do with Crowley is just a guess. But considering how nice he was to her during the whole incident with the memories back on that island, Alice honestly doubts Crowley would even mind if she'd ask if he's been experiencing the same thing.

It's why Alice ends up approaching the demon when she sees him near his gardening plot.

"Crowley," she says at first, trying to draw his attention. "Do you have a moment?"

See, she's actually bothering to be polite. Semi-polite. Polite by Alice's standards. The point is, she wouldn't bother to ask that unless she genuinely liked someone.

Comments

[irrationally]

There's a momentary raise of her eyebrows when he cackles, as if she's not quite sure where this is going to go..

But then instead she faintly rolls her eyes when he's done talking. It's fondly though. By Alice standards, anyway. Well, at least they can still make light of the situation, as odd as it is.

"Just don't make me feel anything too odd or I will know where to find you to demand an explanation."

[agathokakological]

There's a moment when she says that where Crowley feels a tinge of concern, and it's only because he'd immediately thought of the angel Aziraphale and all the terrifying emotions that came along with the thought of him. Terrifying only in a sense of how fragile a demon's ego might be should a human know he shares a deep love with one very stuffy angel. And of course, any teasing he might have to endure because of it. He brushes it off, making a bit of a face, but trying not to show too much on the surface. If anything, this bond with Alice will be a test of his patience with seeming vulnerable time to time.

"I imagine there will be times I'd rather you not find me at all." he mutters, concerned for his privacy, "At least not immediately."

[irrationally]

Talk about getting a cryptic message from a demon, huh.

"Is that a threat?" She asks, not really seriously. Sure, she can't imagine Crowley being particularly happy about someone stumbling upon him while he is dealing with an emotion, considering how he doesn't seem to deal well with vulnerability. (And hey, that makes two of them.) But she doesn't think he'd actually hurt her.

Which is why, a second later, she continues, "I wasn't serious, you know." Another beat, and then she tilts her head slightly. "Well, not entirely."

If it's too weird then you can't just make her live with that without an explanation, Crowley. Okay. Please. She is trying to be respectful here, but she already has enough weird emotions of her own to live with.

"At least give me a warning or something in case things are about to get truly odd."

[agathokakological]

"Only if you take it as one." he replies, sneering slightly. "More like a warning. I close doors for a reason."

His eyes roll slightly at the idea she's presented. If he's feeling any emotion particularly strongly, he's fairly certain that warning Alice might be the last thing on his mind.

"I don't make plans for that sort of thing, you know." he tells her, but gives her a sympathetic look, "All I can say is I'll try."

[irrationally]

Part of her wants to protest. Or say that this isn't exactly easy for her either. But.. she knows. What he's saying is only logical. Who plans a breakdown or any other strong emotion before it happens, huh? Even people who are a bit more in charge of their own mind than she is probably don't have that level of control about it.

So she just releases a slow, deep breath.

"Fine." Message understood. Not like she can ask for more than that, as awkward as this is most likely going to be at times. "Then I'll leave you to your plants again."

[agathokakological]

Crowley can sense that it wasn't the answer she wanted to hear, at least he knows it's likely not the one he would have wanted if he were her. Having sympathy really is a curse, isn't it?

With a deep breath of his own, he attempts to make the peace, moving back across the area toward his plot of dirt.

"You don't have to go if you don't want." he mutters, eyeballing the snoring wobble dog in its little mud hut. "I was going to re-home some of these smaller plants, the larger ones are rooting a bit too big and I don't want them to feel crowded."

[irrationally]

Dear god, how does anyone navigate social situations? Is there some sort of handbook on it that Alice just never recieved? Did everyone get social situation classes while she was stuck locked away as a young girl and then a teenager? It sure is feeling like it, since for a moment Alice has no idea how to even reply to what he's saying. It's just beyond anything she's ever dealt with - someone actually telling her she doesn't have to go.

"Are you sure?"

Look, she knows it's a dumb question, but what else is she supposed to say! She's not used to people saying this!

"You don't want some private time with your plants?" And his.. dog-like creature.. Whatever it is again.

[agathokakological]

Look, Crowley isn't an expert either, but he's been walking the Earth as long as it's existed, so he's learned a thing or two.

"I wouldn't have said so if I wasn't." he notes, not even really looking at her as he replies, off to his tasks. He realizes then that he doesn't have any gardening gloves, and would rather not get dirt under his nails. After a snap of his fingers, there's a pair for him to slip on, as if they were there the entire time.

"If I wanted privacy I'd be behind a locked door." he assures her, finally looking over his shoulder. "Either I'm sleeping or I'm with company. You understand."

[irrationally]

After hesitating for the slightest moment more, Alice just moves to get comfortable near another patch of flowers that Crowley isn't working on. One might think she'd get bored just sitting there, but really, daydreaming among the flowers is exactly the sort of thing Alice does to spend her free time - though she at least feels a tad too embarassed to actually try to talk to them while in company. Even if it's Crowley.

Instead she just stares at him, not even blinking as there are suddenly gloves there which weren't there a moment ago. This wouldn't have been odd even if she hadn't seen him do something similar before.

She closes her eyes once she's comfortable enough.

"Oh please, I don't need to hear about your exploits with company."

Doesn't even want to think about it, thanks! Alice is good just never thinking about romance. Or anything worse beyond that.

[agathokakological]

Funny coincidence, because Crowley himself has made quite a habit out of talking to his plants. At least taking out his anger on them. Funny that a demon who questions God's will so often would choose to play God on his houseplants, but the method works.

Slipping on his gloves, he begins to uproot some of the smaller plants from his plot into a nearby pot. The disturbance to the dirt wakes the sleeping wobbledog, who groans and stretches in his little hole.

"You asked me to warn you." he notes, packing in some additional dirt. "You know, of odd feelings."

His eyes dart to the side, looking at her without turning his head. It's kind of nice to see her comfortable, resting there. Crowley isn't sure he's ever seen her not looking nervous or uncomfortable before, at least outside of her memories, and it brings a soft smile to his lips before he looks back to his own task.

[irrationally]

For a moment she still sits there like that. Eyes closed.

But then that sentence fully seems to dawn upon her, and Alice cracks open an eye. Then another. Her head turns in Crowley's direction, watching him deal with the plants.

"No." She says. Almost incredulously. Please tell her you're kidding, Crowley? Is this a joke? A bad joke, but a joke, right.

But a moment passes and Alice slowly realises this doesn't sound like a joke.

"No.." A tone with all the agony of a middle schooler forced into math class. "You can't be serious. I don't know how to deal with that."

[agathokakological]

While it does occur to him that perhaps neither of them are really used to or equip to deal with a feeling such as love, he'd much rather not say such a word out loud. At least not where anyone but the person he has those sorts of feelings for can hear. He's always been a hopeless romantic, but just so, he's still figuring out that it's okay for him to feel such emotions to begin with, let alone what they all mean.

"I don't need your judgement, you know." he huffs, pushing one of the relocated plants to the side so that he can give her an offended glance. "If I have to deal with your weird teenage girl emotions, you'll have to deal with- er-- whatever I'm feeling." he continues, waving a hand in the air during the last part of his sentence.

The wobble-dog is properly alerted, poking it's stupid head out of it's nap spot to stare at Crowley, all of it's eyes blinking at different times and making him groan irritably. Seven hells, he hates that thing. He can even hear the thing's tail whacking against the mud, likely due to the excitement it feels seeing the demon that resents it so much.

[irrationally]

"I doubt these are normal teenage girl emotions."

Look, Alice is at least self aware enough to realise she is pretty far from being the stereotypical teenage girl. Even just by her own time's standards, she isn't even thinking of modern teenage girls yet!

She glances over at Crowley, following his gaze towards that odd creature that she's seen before, and then back to Crowley with a sigh.

"At least I'm not giving you any.." 'mushy feelings', she almost says, but can already kind of anticipate what kind of reaction the other would give to that. And she so does not want to deal with it. ".. you know what I mean. You're getting off relatively light!"