voidtreckerexpress | Hey look, it's a Tony log

Who: Tony and OTA
Where: Kitchen/ Dining car
When: Bassoon 4-ish
What: Tony's cooking meals, making treats, and generally trying to keep himself busy
Warnings: Irreverence and Language? The usual.

The last team had done a respectable job in the kitchen. He'd had few complaints during the last month. However, between himself and the rest of the red team, especially Feanor, people were going to be very well fed this month.

Even though there were plenty of cooks in this kitchen for the month, this particular day Tony had taken over the kitchen. He was only sort of sticking to the recipes he'd been given, preferring to use his own or make them up as he went (shocking, I know). Currently he had three dishes he was working on at once. He had some salmon he was curing to make lox, some gummy candy he was making, and the main dish for the evening meal- whole roasted salmon with herbs and farfalle pasta with asparagus and tomatoes. Thanks to Evie and Feanor, they also had sourdough bread to go along with it and a fancy Elvish dessert.

Off to one side, he had an eggplant out, ready to fix for certain individuals who saw fish and fled in terror.

[ooc: Feel free to catch him at any point of this meal prep, during clean up, or during the meal. Whatever, you guys know I'll tag anything.]

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Tony was laughing so hard, he couldn't even say hi to Buttercup, but he waved at her. He points at Peter and wheezes out, "He licked my hand! He's a bad, bad kid!"

He tries to wipe his eyes as tears are streaming down his face, but it just smears some flour or sugar or something white on his cheek and nose. His eyes abruptly widen at Peter starting to sing that god-awful song again.

"NO!" Tony cries and puts his hand in some wet sugar and half tackles/ half flails around to get his hand over the kid's mouth again. "Bad Peter! Ba- Hahaha! Stop.. my sides are killing me!"

It's finally happened. Peter has finally lost it completely. Whatever is wrong with him he's infected Tony as well, who seems to have trouble breathing.

She's seen silliness before, among the street thieves and kids of Gauig who she sometimes ran with. But never among adults.

Then Peter was singing and Tony was shouting and trying to get Peter to be quiet.

She held out her hand in front of her and with her other hand pinched her skin, hard. Maybe she had never gotten out of that suitcase? This day was so weird, maybe it is just a dream?

The pinch hurts and Peter is still singing. Not a dream at all.

Some of that wet sugar arcs away from Tony and Peter and strikes a small figure in the doorway square in the face.

There’s an affronted yelp and suddenly there’s a very annoyed undead ten year old staring down at them, Not Amused. Joscelin had just showered, and now there’s powdered sugar dissolving in his still-damp hair.

“Do you have any idea how this looks? I would thank you to keep your sadomasochistic food fights away from public spaces. I do not consent to participate in your perversion.”

Peter licks again but this time he pauses to make a face because that did not taste awesome. He tries to wrestle Mr Stark's hand away from his mouth and takes a deep breath so he can keep singing as loudly as he can.

"Baby shark! MOMMY SHARK DO DO DO DO-WHAT!?" Peter nearly chokes at Joss's comment. "Disgusting!? He's like my dad???"

....

...

WELP.

"Mommy Shark do do do. Mommy Shark!"

Buttercup's face had just made Tony laugh harder. Now with Joss, he could barely breathe again. Without a second thought, he picks up the sink hose, aims, and shoots the vampire kid!

Not a dream and now Joss the blood drinking boy is here and saying words that make even less sense than most the words that ever come out of Peter's mouth and Peter was still singing.

Then Tony was firing water at Joss. What. Was. Happening.

She backed off. Not taking her eyes off the scene. But leaving. Definitely leaving.

She serves chaos but this? What even was this?

“Then why are you—ggnnghhhh!” The water shoots straight into Joss’s open mouth and he splutters and chokes, doubled over, gasping.

When he can finally draw breath again, the very sodden little vampire glares at him with an expression that would be much more intimidating if he didn’t look so much like a drowned cat. “You’re dead, St-Stark.” More coughing.

“And stop singing that fucking song!”

Peter does stop singing. Mostly because the song is really annoying and he knows it and he's already sang the song once. That's enough for anyone really. Besides that, he's still laughing and it's hard to keep his mind focused on the next verse when he's also trying to wrestle Tony's arm away. Well. 'Trying' he's not using his Spider-strength at all.

"Don't let him fool you! It's his favorite song!" He gets out before noticing Buttercup trying to leave. He can't really blame her. They probably all just look crazy right now.

At least the sudden icy shower has distracted Joss from making more inappropriate jokes at Peter's expense. He's too enraged by his dunking to think of much anything else.

Things seem to have calmed slightly--the girl with a terribly unfortunate name is beating a hasty retreat--and Joss wheels on the pair.

"You had better have an explanation for all of this. Stark, you're a grown man, for god's sake."

Tony couldn't stop himself from laughing even if he tried. Right now, he wasn't trying one bit. Except when he looks at Peter and points at Joss. "He looks like a drowned rat! The little drowned rat is asking questions!"

Yes she's just leaving. She doesn't understand. She's never seen adults act like that before, she's never seen people laugh like that before. Not when they were sober anyways. It's strange and she doesn't understand So she's leaving.

Backing out of the carriage and going as far away as possible from that madness.

Hey look, it's a Tony log

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