voidtreckerexpress | Don't Look, it's These Two Being Cute

Ignis was hanging his long black coat up and then moved to straighten his bed. Somehow he hadn't gotten around to that yet. Plus there were chores to do so he needed to get in on that as well. Moving to get everything straightened and tidied up wasn't going to take him long so he got that done.

Once completed, he looked up and saw Tony standing in the doorway looking somewhat expectant. Since no one else was in the room there was only one person the older man could be coming for. So the advisor gave his other half a nod and a smile, leaning against the bed frame with his arms crossed in front of him.

"To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit?"

Tony had his laptop in hand and would've interrupted earlier but he had such a lovely view of Ignis bending over. What he'd come for had momentarily taken a backseat to that eye indulgence. The smirk he had been wearing turned into a broader smile though when he was finally noticed.

"Is it really visiting when it's my room?" He asked, teasingly. He held up his laptop. "I have something I want to show you." He came over and opened the screen. "I don't know why I downloaded this video, it's not the best quality of the song and I have about three other better versions on this computer too," He shrugged, "I'm guessing I was drunk, but, look."

He hit play and let Ignis watch.

He didn't bother to explain the etiquette because his curiousity was piqued by the laptop. Tony then proceeded to sit down and with the screen open, green eyes looked with interest at what was being presented. Sitting next to the older man, the advisor stared at the monitor and saw the pictures flash of a big cat.

With the song playing and the title screen had shown up, he nodded. "Ah, so that is what a tiger is.." So this was what Tony had been comparing him to. Well it was definitely an impressive animal, being beautiful, regal and majestic in its own right. He was also listening to the song that was playing, being one that he'd never heard before.

"You and your son Peter seem to have music in common with all of the songs he had played a little while back." While Ignis hadn't commented to the playlist, he listened to everything the boy had played. What was the name of the band? Oh right, Imagine Dragons. "That an a penchant for things that are bad for you." There was a pointed look into the dark eyes after that was said.

Tony was pleased with Ignis' reaction to the tiger pictures. It had been a strange thing to keep comparing Ignis to something he hadn't ever seen before. "It's too bad I can't show you something better than this, but at least it's something." He went to turn off the song, but then stopped when it seemed Ignis was enjoying it. Huh, so his boyfriend had good taste in music. Good to know!

"He was playing music for you?" He asked surprised. "I didn't know you two had spent much time together." He set the laptop aside, letting the music continue. He paused and looked back at the younger man with some confusion. "What do you mean? Because of the music we like?"

"He was playing music for the train about a week ago. I'm unsure as to how you missed it." Ignis had listened through the entire list that Peter had played while reading. The last questions got an eye roll. "You sounded angry about his post about how to acquire more points."

The advisor himself had gone to offer but was beaten to it and then Tony sounded angry so he hadn't offered. "I know others know of your love of coffee, so therefore I'm sure you're drinking it past the time you're supposed to." Unfortunately he knows of another dark haired troublemaker that would no doubt do the very same thing. Noctis wasn't good about being sneaky either fortunately like Peter wasn't.

Tony laughed, his cheeks dusting just a little with color. "Oh right that. No.. I.. I do remember that." He rubbed his face and shook his head at his own stupidity. "A lot's been going on lately."

The remark about Peter's stupid message had him sighing. "He's driving me crazy with that damn red bull garbage. May and I both have told him we don't want him drinking that stuff. It's not like coffee, Ignis. It's that Peter has a very unique biology and he's allergic to so many things. I don't know what that stuff is doing to him. On top of that, I know he's doing it to avoid sleeping. He tries to stay awake for days at a time and then crashes. I don't know how to help him with what happened to him any more than I already have, but I know that can't be the right way to cope with his trauma either."

Which of course Ignis had to bring up about his coffee consumption too. "It's still less than it was! And I've quit drinking it after like late afternoon- well dinner at the latest. That's progress."

Ignis looked at Tony concerned. "A lot that you've been too busy to notice perhaps?" He thought a moment. "When was the last time you took a day off from all of the projects you incessantly occupy your time with?" The advisor asked this while staring into the brown orbs which was always a dangerous thing. "Am I going to need to tie you to the bed tomorrow?" There was a slight hint of steel in his tone that conveyed he could be serious about this and turn it around to make it happen.

His eyes saddened as he got the report that Peter was doing this to avoid sleeping. "That means you both have unhealthy coping mechanisms." He was going to make a parental comparison again but stopped himself in time. "I suppose then like you, his other half may be appealed to, as a sort of way of persuading Peter to either come talk to you or find some healthier way to deal with things?" Ignis figured it wouldn't be a stretch of the imagination that someone was going to pull this on them someday.

Tony got a sigh and a shake of the head before going into I'm-not-allowing-you-any-leeway-here-mode. "Then the day after tomorrow you're taking a day off. No distractions, no excuses, nothing. You're going to spend the entire day with me. And I'm going to pull this on you at least three days a week."

He shrugged with a sigh. He couldn't deny he'd been so busy lately he might have missed a few things here and there. However, the question about taking a day off had the older man looking at Ignis confused. "What do you mean? I took a week off from them when we did our mission." His eyebrows rose in surprise at being told he was getting tied down. He searched Ignis' face for any sign that was supposed to be some kind of sexy suggestion, but no. Ignis just looked serious and he wondered what was behind all of this. Was Ignis unhappy with how he was being treated? Memories of how unhappy Pepper had been a few times in their relationship came back to his mind and he felt his heart sink. "Have I been neglecting you?"

"Me? I don't have unhealthy coping mechanisms. I was saying Peter does." Except, okay maybe he did have unhealthy ones too, but that was beside the point wasn't it? "His other half? Wait, are you meaning Gwen? I should.. he doesn't come to me about those things anymore. Not with May here, he doesn't. I don't know if he has late night talks with her like we used to but.. I mean, you know that. He used to wake me up in middle of the night and obviously, you'd have witnessed that." It was pretty hard to sneak out of a twin bed with two full sized adult men.

His jaw dropped open at the conclusion Ignis came to. "What? Three days a week? But what about the yoga class and school and.. what brought all of this on?"

"A mission is an entirely different entity." Ignis shook his head. No, his tying down wasn't a sexy sort of suggestion either. "I'm not worried about me." This was said somewhat defensively and defectively. They hadn't spent much time together lately, but the advisor didn't feel that he needed to be by Tony's side every single moment because they now shared a room that they both came back to every night. It was a huge adjustment for him though because he was used to being around Noct and the other two at all times. He didn't want to be the 'ball and chain' as he'd heard others on the train say about their significant others.

The unhealthy coping mechanisms denial got a look that clearly conveyed Ignis didn't believe him but he didn't argue the point. "If you don't think it would do any good to approach her, then don't. It was merely a suggestion." And that's all it was. "Mayhaps you should speak with his aunt then if you're sure Peter won't listen to you." Anything was better than seeing these two suffer due to a lack of communication and understanding.

"You didn't recall Peter playing his music and you're always busy. So I have to wonder what's got you stewing. You need to take breaks and if you won't do them on your own, whoever it is can think I'm the bad person." He paused and recalled Lightning's words to him. "It's as was told to me, it's my job to make sure you don't break down. And if you do, then I will be right beside you."

Edited 2019-12-30 06:27 (UTC)

"Well, I am!" Tony countered immediately. "You're just as important as I am, if not more so." Why would Ignis even say that? It was frustrating and it bothered him that it might still be something the other man thought. He was hoping it had just come out wrong, but did Ignis think he didn't matter still?

"Wait.. I'm just trying to figure out what you're saying to me. You're throwing a lot at me at once." And he was still worried where this was all coming from. There had to be more behind all of this, didn't there? In a different tone, maybe the most honest one so far, he shook his head and said, "I'm not that sure about anything right now." Hadn't that been made painfully clear to everyone on this train at the council meeting?

His gaze dropped to the floor as these things were pointed out to him. However, it snapped right back up at Ignis saying he was willing to be viewed as the bad person. "Who? Who told you.. did someone say this was your job?" It turned his stomach to think someone was making Ignis feel bad, but it also was alarming to think the people on the train were thinking he was headed for a mental breakdown. "I know you would, darling. But talk to me. What's happened to make you feel like this?"

At the insistence, Ignis just stared at Tony. The leader of the train didn't need his advisor just hanging around him all of the time. It was a hole in his own heart that he dealt with on a daily basis, one that didn't need to be shared.

So a sigh came out. "Plainly speaking you need to take breaks. You're exhausting yourself trying to please and do for others all of the time with little to no regard for yourself." A worried look crossed the younger man's features, because that sounded troublesome and he needed to figure out how and where to help. Breaks would help and slowing down wasn't in the older man's vocabulary so it was no wonder he was experiencing push back. Of course the advisor couldn't and wouldn't dare think that for one moment the other man would be excited about this or looking forward to them spending time together so he didn't and hadn't.

The head shook. "It was a reminder that it is my job to look after you." Ignis bore no ill will towards Lightning at all for what she had said. Another sigh came out. "Have you forgotten that I keep an eye on you and that you come to bed at odd hours? You look worn out every evening and it's worrying." There, he said it.

"You want me to talk to you, and yet I could say the same to you." Yup, he said that too.

Edited 2019-12-30 07:18 (UTC)

Was Ignis sure about that?

He listened with a frown, though the confusion was finally gone. This certainly wasn't the first time he'd been told these words. The worry was evident in Ignis' tone, posture, and expression making the older man feel a sharp sense of guilt. "I know. The thing is.. these projects.. they aren't really for others so much as they are for me. Yes, I'm doing things that would benefit others but that's not why I'm doing them. So that's the big secret there, I'm really being selfish by doing them." He reached out and took Ignis' hand, while he worked on how to explain what had been bothering him so much lately.

"My life is so different here. I have so much less control and as cliche as that is, I hate not having what I used to. I have a flying suit because I loved the freedom it gave me in addition to all the other benefits. I had a large house in the woods with about a zillion acres around it for my daughter to play in and Pepper and I to go hiking in. I had resources that outmatched quite a few countries. I could buy anything and everything I ever wanted and I enjoyed treating those I loved with those riches. I can't spoil you with hardly anything because I don't have access to anything worth giving you. I had laws of physics and governmental regulations that made sense. Mostly. I had connections in government, business, charities, everywhere. Now, we have a corpse who has a flame for a head, a constantly growing influx of people, there's inspectors with armor my weapons couldn't even touch, a conductor in charge of everything I can't speak to, we have to share a bedroom the size of a shoe box with two kids, and I have to find pictures of tigers just so you understand a tiny detail about my world." He shook his head and gave a laugh that had absolutely no humor behind it. "So.. I work. In a room that is smaller than my daughter's closet."

No, he's not done. "And I know we've talked about this before and it helped for a while but.. I have made absolutely no real progress in sending those people home who have a home and family to go back to or a means to keep those who are finally happy somewhere doing something important. Especially someone who means the world to me and I have no ability to prevent from being sent home tomorrow if the conductor so chose and I would never see again. Aren't you glad you asked?"

Something felt off and Ignis couldn't shake that feeling. He was concerned when Tony took his hand but he listened intently. As he listened to the words spoken, he had to smile just a little because he'd thought some of the very same things.

The spoiling comment had the advisor lower his head with the slightest embarrased laugh because that's not what he was about. But the rest he took seriously except to smile about the tiger part and nodded in some understanding. Ignis knew all too well about working instead of dealing with troubling things.

A gentle smile crossed his features then ad he squeezed the hand in his. "You're not a magician or a deity that has the power to send those home who wish to go. Nor can you keep those at your side who are most dear to you. You're human and you're stressing yourself out over things that were never in your control."

With a sigh, Ignis moved his hand from Tony's and wrapped his arms around the older man. He lifted a hand to cradle the back of the man's dark head just to hold him close and offer what little comfort he could.

He thought back to something Cid said to Noctis before they boarded the boat to Altissia and paraphrased. "I may not be able to solve all of your problems. But I'm glad you're no longer hiding them from me."

Ignis didn't speak again for awhile and held Tony close. And then a thought occured to him. "Would you have me speak to Eva regarding who wanted you to produce results to the council?" That had been fair to ask but at the same time, not reporting meant that there had been nothing to report yet. And here Tony was tearing himself apart over it.

That made Ignis irritated and worried.

He heard the words and understood the care behind them, but it was hard- if not impossible- for him to accept. He knew he wasn't a god, but he'd made the impossible happen so many times before. Why couldn't he do the same here? "How do I accept that I can't do those things? I've built time machines and many other things. Why can't I do this too?"

Sighing, he leaned into the embrace, quietly enjoying the contact and support. Ignis had been a life saver and he knew that wasn't going to change. The remark on keeping things quiet had him drawing back so he could meet Ignis' gaze again. "I just figured they were obvious. I wasn't trying to not tell you. Why complain about something you can't change and I'm sure everyone else on this train is also experiencing?"

He pulled Ignis to him again and pressed a soft kiss to his forehead. His lips curled into a smile at the offer. "Maybe, but only if you tell me who has been 'reminding' you of your duty to take care of me? That's not fair to you and I don't appreciate someone doing that to you." He playfully ruffled the man's hair too. "And now it's your turn. Spill. You are infuriatingly tight-lipped, you know that?"

"Find things you can accomplish and be proud of here." Ignis suggested gently. It was a change to see Tony not be egotistical and caught up in what he could do. The advisor knew damn well that his mate was feeling helpless and frustrated but that came with the territory of being trapped in a train.

A small laugh came out."Darling when you bottle things up you become destructive so there's nothing wrong with venting even if there's nothing anyone can do. You need to let things out or you're going to explode." His hands now went to gently comb through the dark locks affectionately.

The kiss from Tony was remarkably sweet and he shook his head. "It was an offhanded comment and nothing was meant by it."

At the tight lipped comment, the older man received a stern look that was half hearted at best. "You want to hear the concerns of what was it Madoka said? The second most handsome man on the train?"

"No, the answer is to keep pushing and eventually succeeding. I'm not giving up on this or on keeping you here with me, as selfish as that is. I know you have something to go home to and so do I, but those can wait till we're ready for them." Did a person ever get ready for death?

He scowled like a child being told he couldn't keep harassing the family cat. "I thought I was doing better about not exploding." He'd been trying to hold on to his anger better. Had he not been doing it correctly? Some of his focus though faded as he melted into Ignis' side. He really loved when people did that- people like Pepper or Ignis. Although now that he was feeling a little better, he could admit it (since no one else was in the room). "I know I overreacted to Peter. That's happened a couple times lately." He knew he was admitting that Ignis was right, but so long as the other man didn't make him come right out and say it in those words.

Then again, if Ignis gave him a certain smile, he might be willing to even do that.

He looked up at Ignis at the retort blankly for a moment before it clicked. He laughed and nodded. "She told you that? I didn't think she really would." He shook his head, but the smile didn't fade. "Sometimes I'm terrified Morgan will be like her and other times I can only hope she's just like Madoka."

There weren't many times that Ignis was rendered speechless by Tony. But at hearing that the older man wanted to keep the advisor by his side, well someone could've knocked him over with a feather. And even as the logic of the others statement went through his mind, nothing came out of his mouth.

Finally his brain clicked in enough to actually work coherently and he smiled. "You are, but keeping anger bottled doesn't suit you." This was accompanied by more gentle head scratches and a cuddle.

The advisor knew that he was right and so he didn't feel the need to rub it in Tony's face. Instead he just stayed quiet, letting his mate relax.

He got a smile about Madoka. "She is exactly what I would think my own daughter would be like, if I ever had one." A smirk tugged at his lips. "Minus the pink hair of course." Another thought. "I don't recall her ever speaking of having parents." Green eyes stared at Tony. "Has she ever mentioned them to you darling? "

Tony frowned as he watched the surprise on Ignis' face. How could the man still not get it? It had taken a while for Pepper to get it to. Was it him or the people he chose? He waited for the question that kept lighting in Ignis' eyes, but it didn't come.

His arms wrapped around the other man more tightly wishing he knew how to make all of this easier for himself as well as the other. "I'll keep working on it," he promised. It's what he always did. He'd find a way to make it up to Peter whether directly or otherwise.

Tony chuckled at the pink hair comment. "I hope Morgan would have more confidence and know to believe in herself. Don't get me wrong, she's endlessly sweet and I'd do anything for her.. I just want more for her than she's gotten so far. It's like with Buttercup too. Someone failed those girls and they deserve better." He nodded at the question. "I remember us speaking of her family when she first arrived, particularly her mother. I don't remember if she talked about her father or not." Maybe it was fathers who were supposed to give their children confidence and mothers their sweetness. He didn't know for sure, but he hoped he'd given Morgan enough in the first few years of her life to help her in the future when she doubted herself. "But she now has you."

It couldn't be what his mind was turning this into. No, he was simply connecting too many dots and it wasn't like that between them. Tony just wanted him there to help and to..be lovers. It was nothing beyond that. Turning away, Ignis just kept pushing the rising feelings and questions out of his mind.

He sighed into that tight hold and placed his head on top of the dark one, remembering to keep running his fingers through the dark curls. "That's what I love about you, you never give up." The advisor's tone had turned affectionate and loving when saying that. And he did his best to try and not hurt for the man in his arms for the daughter that he would never see grow to be a beautiful woman. "We can help them." Ignis encouraged. "And the same goes for Romeo and Joss. You're quite good at collecting all of the children to you."

Ignis didn't know what to say to the part about Madoka. Tony had him again, was that the man's gift? All he could do was adjust his glasses as he had around the pink haired girl. "I..you make me sound like a parent." It was a nagging feeling he'd been ignoring ever since that little girl took his hand. It felt more that she had taken his heart, whatever was left after Tony.

He gently unclasped his lover, not sure how to feel about all of this. However, his mind was working as it always was even as he turned his body around. How would she feel if she could hear Tony say these things? Could he take the leap he kept pushing off and ignoring? Wouldn't that be invading her personal bubble? What if she didn't want a dad type?

He didn't ask for jewelry to be commissioned and or be monogamous for just anyone. He'd told Ignis he loved him and he meant it. When Ignis looked away, Tony wondered what was on the man's mind. That was exactly what he'd meant by the man didn't share with him.. and it hurt.

In the privacy of their own bedroom and no roommates about, he could enjoy being soothed and the affectionate touches. He wouldn't mind getting them more often, but he knew his boyfriend was obsessed with being 'proper'. Try as he might, he couldn't deny the truth in what Ignis was saying about the kids on this train too. He had tried to ignore it for a while, but it was true. "We have that in common, my dear."

He drew back a little at the uncertainty regarding Madoka. "Good, that's what I'm intending to sound like," he affirmed pointedly. "Children need their parents. They need someone to love and pay attention to them. The only thing I'd encourage more from you than I've seen is kids like it when you ask them questions and really get to know what they like and have experienced. Ask Madoka about her family and her past. Hell, she was trying to find a cat when she arrived, ask her about that. You might be surprised how much joy she gets in sharing who she is with you. It's a privilege dads like us get to have for caring and protecting them."

It was a topic that Ignis had talked to Curufin about, but never breathed a word of it to Tony for fear it would start an argument or balking. After all, he'd promised he wouldn't ask so he was avoiding an argument, or at least he was trying. Maybe avoiding it would cause the fight but he was trying to stave it off. He didn't want them to argue or whatever.

"I.." the advisor faltered again. For the life of him he couldn't fathom why the children seemed to enjoy his presence and be happy around him. Green eyes tore away from Tony as doubts wracked him. "You've been a parent, this must come so easy to you." And in that moment Ignis envied his mate's easy way with the children, even though yes he was stern at times with them too. "What if..what if none of them even want parents?" Ignis realized he was balking at this as much as he figured Tony would about that other topic.

He took a few steps away from Tony and stopped. Taking a child on had the same effect as that other thing. There were no guarantees, there was no calculation that he could make that would ensure everything came out in a perfectly planned way. There was no way he could plan it so that the child or children came with him just as he couldn't do the same with his lover.

This was more Tony's territory, messy, full of emotions and ..he sighed, turning back to his mate to look at him. The fear, the uncertainty, was this what it was like to be a parent?

Tony was taken back by that conclusion. “Tiger, none of this is easy. It’s terrifying to be trusted so completely by a child. My own father never wanted anything to do with me. My mother was in capable of acknowledging anything he did as less than perfect. I’m severely under qualified for the role I’m playing. But Morgan needed a dad and for some reason, that was me. These kids here need role models and for some reason I keep finding myself in that role. It wouldn’t be so daunting if it wasn’t so important.”

He shrugged at Ignis’ worry. “Just be there ready to offer if if they need it whether they like it or not. Being a dad isn’t always about doing what they want. You’re older and wiser and can see when they might need something before they realize it.” He got up and pulled Ignis back into his arms. “I give you my word I’m not just blowing smoke up your ass because you’re my boyfriend. If I didn’t think you were fit for the role I’d tell you.”

He pressed a light kiss to Ignis’ cheek. “So what did you tell her about me?”

Those words temporarily stunned the advisor and he shook his head in disbelief. "But you..you're so brave and so natural with them. Are you scared when you're interacting with them and merely hiding it?" No, Tony wasn't scared of tiny humans or small vampires, right? His eyes widened a bit in surprise by the admission that he was under qualified but that had Ignis shake his head again. "But you are a father already, I would say that puts you in the top reasons to be in the role."

He found himself back in Tony's arms and wasn't quite sure how that happened but he really appreciated it none the less. The advisor sighed and let himself be held, trying to figure this whole thing out. Closing his eyes he only temporarily allowed the pampering. His thoughts went to a little pink haired girl. How was she feeling? What was she doing right now? Was she alright?

Pulling back at Tony's question, Ignis smiled slightly. "I told her you had a big heart and that you always took care of others." He then moved out of his boyfriend's arms. "Do you..do you plan on doing anything to formalize your father status with Joss? Would he want to become a Stark?" It was on the tip of his tongue to ask about Peter too, but Ignis didn't do it. Would that be something the boy wanted? No, he had his aunt here, so that was probably not going to happen at all.

"Yeah, usually," Tony admitted with a bit of a laugh. "Same as I am with leading this train. I'm glad I'm fooling you into thinking I know what I'm doing though." Tiny humans were scary, and not because one of them was a vampire. "It's so easy to hurt them and make mistakes. That's one thing I like about working with iron and titanium alloy. They don't require you to be gentle with them." He thought for a moment before giving Ignis a smile. "I worry about hurting you too, you know. Why didn't you talk to me sooner that I wasn't giving you enough of my time? I need to be reminded to keep my priorities straight and your at the top of that list."

He let Ignis pull away, unsure what else was going through the young man's mind. Hearing about his heart had him shaking his head, but he was flattered that was what came to mind. Ignis had said the same thing often enough to make Tony believe it was genuinely how he was viewed by the advisor. It was humbling and intimidating.

The question completely surprised him and he stared at Ignis for a moment, unsure how to respond to that. "No, I hadn't even thought of that." Would Joss want something like that? "I offered it to Buttercup once and she responded very poorly to the idea. But.. do you think Joss would want that?" He honestly didn't know. "I don't know how official anything is around here though." If it helped, Tony was clearly mulling over the idea.

Ignis smiled. "You certainly put on a convincing enough act." There were times through them talking that the advisor knew Tony was uncertain about something or other. But sometimes when he came to bed at night, he was so full of ideas and things that he wanted to accomplish. The older man's stamina in so many ways was nothing less than incredible.

A small laugh came out about not having to be gentle with iron and titanium but his green eyes looked into Tony's regarding the personal parts. "You've more than enough to worry about here. I don't want to be a burden."

Seeing the unsure look on Tony's face and hearing the wonder in his tone had Ignis smile softly. "I don't know him well enough darling. But he does call you Dad which is always wonderful to hear."

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