voidtreckerexpress | [CLOSED] how could I ever think it's funny

Entry tags:

elidibus [ou]

[CLOSED] how could I ever think it's funny

Who: Ansem and Xehanort, later Vexen. Also Special Guest Elidibus!
Where: Quiet Car, later elsewhere
When: Llama 21
What: Ansem informs Xehanort of his actions upon others, and offers him a choice.
Warnings: Horrible Decisions and Regret. Highlight the following for spoilers, but this is a heavy log and has some heavy content. CW for manipulation, attempted murder/suicide via poisoning, and talk of trauma/death/etc.

Ansem's memories were coming back in time on their own. Mostly, they came dreamlike, in slow bits and patches that he was eventually able to connect to others for a larger pictures. Occasionally, though, there was a sudden connection, a sudden flash; most often, these came upon a familiar action or face.

Such as Xehanort's own.

After speaking with others, learning more- it was, perhaps, no surprise that the memories that surfaced afterwards were ones primarily connected with the other man. His apprenticeship. His betrayal. His actions on to others- and Ansem himself, trapped in darkness, with only anger and rage to sustain him. Letting it drive him once he escaped to spread further harm to others, all in the name of revenge...

He could not change the past. He knew that. But...perhaps. Perhaps one could keep it from repeating.

And so he sought out the other, first checking his room, then the library- and then, as he moved past through the quiet car, he happened to glance through a window and find him. Well. That was convenient. A light rap on the door, and-

"Xehanort- I'd like to speak with you, please."

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Some hours passed after Even had escorted Ansem to his room. Resting helped with digesting the events, but it was far from restful. There was still a gnawing inside, a firm awareness of what he had done, whether or not he had succeeded.

He would have to find Xehanort to speak with him- likely, with someone else present, if only to reassure Xehanort that Ansem wasn't having third thoughts. Or...he sighed, on his way to the dining carriage, badly craving coffee with as much cream and sugar as he could possibly fit in to it. Once he'd had that...

Once he'd had that, he'd speak with Even, get a gauge of the situation, and then deal with the consequences of his actions. One could not avoid them, whether or not they were a king.

Edited 2021-06-09 19:32 (UTC)

There had been an announcement on the train's intercom. Elidibus recognized the name 'Even' and heard the undercurrent in the voice who made the request. It's little wonder that his thoughts are drawn to a certain supposition. And thus he decides to go see if he is correct in his assumption that a tipping point was reached in the matter of the young mortal Xehanort.

So he was near enough to the quiet carriage when doors were opened and any blocks, via the train's structure, in his ability to process the flow of aether were removed. Enough to confirm Xehanort seems to still live, though in a passive- sleeping?- state.

Elidibus does not linger overmuch. He has every reason and right to be here and unexpected but with a physical body, it does mean people see him. So maybe Ansem (and Even) will remember this man was quietly passing through in the opposite direction when the latter led the former to the sleeper cars for rest. Of course, they no doubt had other things on their mind.

Still, it might be something recollected when the selfsame man stands waiting inside the dining carriage. Somehow a few inches to the right of the door to allow the next person entering the room to technically pass by.

"Good afternoon. May we have words?"

Except words are addressed to Ansem. Elidibus was absolutely not in the hall preceding the king's entry yet he seems possessed of the assurance that the next person who would walk through is the one he is here waiting to meet.

Elidibus may not be capable of traveling to other worlds currently or indeed outside the train confines. But his teleportation is perfectly serviceable within. Once he had discerned Ansem left his cabin and was certain it was not to return to the specific booth- indeed even if Xehanort and Even are still there- the Ascian had decided to approach the man in the dining carriage.

Before coffee.

"Hm?"

He doesn't startle, as he had when Even had earlier arrived, but he does look sharply towards the voice as his steps slow. A man he doesn't recognize- he blinks once, and then tilts his head slightly.

"Is there something I can help you with?"

"Yes," comes the calm answer. The man in question seems young in appearance. It would be lucky if he were in his mid-twenties by looks alone. Yet there is something about his gaze and calm regard which implies a patient and stillness you do not generally find in such youth.

"I believe we have a mutual acquaintance. We met on the last platform and spoke of our shared circumstances as new passengers. Xehanort is his name."

It's clear he knows Ansem is someone who will know the name very well. He may well be watching for a reaction, though his manner and tone remain polite.

"I would like to learn more of his comrades."

Utterly polite.

While Ansem is hardly as composed as he normally is, he is familiar with veiling his thoughts as need be. For all Radiant Garden was a virtual utopia, there were still politics, and a King could hardly wear his thoughts on his sleeve. So, while his brow does arch, there is only so much of a reaction, otherwise.

Indeed, the politeness reminds him of politics. He is not certain whether that is a good or bad thing.

"He is- my Apprentice, yes," Ansem confirms, with only the barest of hesitations. "I am Ansem, though I am assuming you knew such- and you are...?" There's a slight tilt of his head, tone mild...if weary.

Edited 2021-06-09 20:51 (UTC)

"Ah, yes. The King," the man acknowledges. There is a hint he had names but may not have yet tied them to an identity. Perhaps this is intentional; the Ascian had plenty of time while waiting for Ansem to emerge or even before to compare faces to names on the roster.

There was no disparagement of his title in stating it. Only confirmation.

"I am Elidibus. Though I am not of your world, I have taken a small interest in learning more of it and yourself. Will you indulge me?"

In political speak translated, it's probably evident this is not going to be a wonderful conversation. Whether it's good or bad remains to be seen still.

The arch of his brow goes just a bit higher, but- of course Xehanort would have mentioned his title. Ansem's expression calms to neutrality quickly enough as he nods in acceptance of the name, even as his tired mind races.

...he's not awake enough for this. But. He's no fool.

"Over coffee," he agrees. "Or tea, as your preference."

He'll just be continuing on upstairs towards the makers now, thank you.

Ah yes the convention of food and drink during conversation. Elidibus can concede this need. It is a simple enough price to pay to get some of Ansem's time. And perhaps a reason why he set himself to greet the man before any food or beverage could be approached. After all it would be more appealing to talk to someone willing to give in to concessions.

"I have no preference." Or indeed any particular desire to care much, even if a nagging notion at the back of his mind suggests the memory of warm beverages during conversation being nice. "Though I will join you."

And he does, following Ansem to the carriage's second level. Though Elidibus will also obtain a cup of coffee in the end, he seems more interested in watching what Ansem does to flavor is drink than setting about his own preferences. The astute will likely even notice a mimicry of the style.

Well if he must join for the sake of continuing the conversation, he may as well indulge in a curiosity.

"Very well." Coffee is quick enough, at least, and he fills the space with smalltalk; when Elidibus first arrived on the train, how he takes his coffee, and so forth. While it can be simply to fill the silence...it's also a very subtle probing of Ansem's own. To understand how this man speaks, for he is on...he's just tired, he tells himself. Tired and stressed. No wonder he's on guard, especially with Elidibus introducing himself in such a manner. What Ansem would truly like is some further time alone, but...

He will grant this. Perhaps it will be a distraction. Perhaps not.

"Well, then- here, unless you have somewhere else you would like to speak of my home?" Ansem is resting a hand on the back of a chair, but this, too, is a bit of a probe. Is this a public or private conversation, Elidibus?

Small talk is it? Some questions are straightforward enough. The last platform as he mentioned before. He would try 'this' manner, in regard to coffee. It is wise to be on guard, particularly when tired. But Elidibus speaks in truths while adroitly avoiding topics which could be considered the 'main event' or particularly probing.

One thing for certain, the person who approached Ansem to talk is very, very good with words. Nothing he says rings of falsehood and it is dangerously close to seeming the entire truth. Though surely in some ways, such as the bit about coffee and how he ends up literally mimicking Ansem, there is more to a tale.

Another thing of note is a manner of address which avoids the use of personal name. He does not appear to mind any reference to his own, though the king will not be directly referred to as Ansem. Though 'your majesty' or other phrases of respect will also be missing.

The ball will be caught and easily driven back into Ansem's court with the most calm of answers. "The setting does not concern me, else I would have approached you in another fashion." Public or private, Elidibus will still talk openly about what he intends to address. "Where would you have us talk about your world and its future, King of Radiant Garden?"

Oh.

It's a bit of a dance, isn't it? One in which Ansem is admittedly out of practice, but one never forgets the steps. Perhaps he can be forgiven a faltering, though, with his hand tightening just a bit on the back of the chair.

For a long moment, he studies Elidibus's face. Trying to understand how much he knows, for those words were knowingly chosen. Finally, he makes a short 'hm'.

"For Xehanort's sake, I would prefer this to be held in private."

The fewer who have reasons to mistrust him, the less likely a chance that another terrible mistake may be made. Let him be the only one to have erred so, and he will be sated.

Those words were specifically chosen. And so are Elidibus's next. "Yes. A wise decision."

For Xehanort's sake? To prefer this conversation be held privately? Or is it both? There is no tell suggesting which way the Ascian's intent leans.

Or indeed just how much this conversation is out of regard for a new acquaintance or a personal vested interest.

"As you are more familiar with the train's layout, I would ask that you lead the way. Though I imagine it will be the previous carriage once more?"

Once more. They had not met there. So that means...

It isn't that he's just tired. This is stepping in to very, very dangerous territory. And Ansem is aware that his utter lack of reaction could be just as telling as if he'd turned away now, but that? Is no longer an option.

And no doubt Elidibus himself knows that Ansem has realized it, himself.

He brings the coffee to his lips, testing it to ensure it is to his liking, then makes a final adjustment to the mixture. From there, he moves back towards the stair, not even glancing towards the other man - it is clear he expects to be followed. The walk itself is in utter silence, a sharp contrast to the short trip upstairs, and the purposeful stride he bears dissuades any who would interrupt them.

Where the room he had spoken with Xehanort was towards the center of the carriage, this is merely the first open one he sees. He opens it, gestures for Elidibus to precede him, and then shuts it behind them before taking a seat - still silent. Still expectant. Still waiting.

The mimicry does not extend to the taste test. But it does include the last adjustment. Without more than the moment needed to let Ansem start on his way does Elidibus then follow.

Some who would look at him without context may even get the impression that they are simply going in the same direction just by presence alone. Yet it is pretty clear one is following the other.

It has been mentioned before but Elidibus does not often sit. The number of times he's sat down for conversation or otherwise in this train life might already outweigh the amount he's done so in the last millennia. So there is a small moment's pause as he weighs his options before finally sitting down in the seat opposite Ansem's.

And since this is a matter of indulging curiosity, he takes an experimental sip of the coffee. The experience is given due thought and seems to interest him. Then the cup is set on the table of the booth and the blue eyes focus upon the other man.

"Your apprentice told me," Elidibus begins, "of the existence of a castle known as Radiant Garden. Though this speaks little of the world around it. What would you tell an outsider, when describing your world?"

Edited 2021-06-09 23:49 (UTC)

Not going straight for the throat, then. Ansem allows himself another sip of his own coffee. holding it in both hands as he considers- both of the course of questioning, and what to say. Finally...

"Radiant Garden," he begins, "is deserving of its name. A land that has been allowed to flourish without peril for many years- not since I was a boy had we undergone anything to tarnish its prosperity." His eyes half-close, for despite his wariness of this man...the memories are fond ones, and it's clearly he dearly misses his home. "Its people are kind. Enemies, unheard of. I was proud of it, though I and my Apprentices did not see this as an excuse to ignore our stewardship.

"You will have to forgive me," he adds, refocusing on Elidibus. "For before I became a passenger of this train, I was in a place that sapped my memory. There is a possibility that I will not be able to give you the answers you seek, unless I understand what you are looking for- and even then."

The admission of weakness is multi-layered. It is not an excuse, for Ansem seems quite honest- but it is also a shield, in case he need deflect.

"In addition, it has been many years since I saw it with my own eyes. Not by choice, but circumstance."

Going straight for the throat would lose Elidibus more than he could gain. But everything has its purpose. Having a perspective of the setting will allow him to taken in Ansem's character and provide clues to fill in the missing pieces of the story he possesses so far.

"Answer as you will." A place which saps the memory... Elidibus can relate to the slow drain of memories but now is not the time to express that. Something may flicker in the calm gaze but it is very fleeting. "I am certain you realize I have not approached you for the sake of memories you cannot recollect."

It may be a shield. But Elidibus will be watching what Ansem attempts to deflect as much as he intends to aim for pieces which have little to do with lost memories.

And while there are some indicators about circumstances, the Ascian does not immediately jump upon them. "I saw you with a small group on the platform. Were both men accompanying you apprentices?"

"Mm." No, he has the feeling that this is something else. Another sip of coffee, allowing the heat to warm his hands. "One is, for certain. The other says he had just become one." A slight tilt of the head, implying that such was a lost memory- if it was one at all. "Have you spoken with either of them, yet?"

Or is Ansem the first he is interrogating?

"Even." The name is offered as a statement, as if Ansem were confirming what Elidibus already knows. But many reasons exist for the Ascian to be so assured. It was a name he heard shouted, one mentioned in conversation as 'present' at the time of the encounter. And then there was the intercom and the subsequent interest which drew Elidibus to the quiet carriage some time ago to see Ansem being aided back to his cabin. Easy enough.

"You are the first." Design? Happenstance? It is a bit of both in all honesty. Elidibus would have definitely desired to meet the King of Radiant Garden first so this fair and wise man Xehanort described would not have time to prepare. Or to be warned and protected by others.

Yes, this was the best possible outcome given what he knows.

"Will you explain to me about the concept of Darkness and Light from your world's view?"

It speaks of itself, at least, and Ansem nods. Both in acknowledgement of the name, and of him being the first. Indeed, this man has a curiosity in what happened in that carriage, if he does not already know...but his roundabout questioning could be meant to disarm as much as gain knowledge. Ansem does not know for certain what he is after, but for now, he sees no reason to become alarmed more than the prickle at the back of his neck.

He will not let his guard down. But nor will he allow it to block out the other.

"I have come to determine that they are as much basic forces as they are realms of existence." But. More than that. "In loose terms; Light is what we consider a 'positive' to the 'negative' of Darkness. They oppose one another by nature, while at the same time being inextricably connected. There are very, very few natural beings that only possess one or the other within their Hearts."

With the general said, he narrows in on some specifics; it is, by his own nature, a somewhat scientific explanation. And he does seem to have some personal experience with it, himself. In essence, it sums up to Light as a producer, a creator; Darkness as its foil, that which consumes - though both could sustain life. He also does not appear to regard either necessarily as 'good' or 'evil', though he certainly seems to have a healthy respect for Darkness that borders on wariness.

Edited 2021-06-10 21:33 (UTC)

There are slight variances still. Perspective is like that but it is a pity. Elidibus does realize that to some extent he will be unable to truly compare the difference between his universe and that of this other in Light and Dark without actually seeing it for himself.

"Realms, is it?" Elidibus taps a finger on top of the table surface, thoughtful. "I am familiar with the concept of Light and Dark as basic forces. Your apprentice also suggested they are separate realms. I would ask you explain this in your own words."

With a pause he adds.

"What manner of natural beings would you describe these creatures who are wholly Light or wholly Darkness?" Not the unnatural. Just... natural. It appears to interest him more than the explanation of separate realms, however.

"A Realm of Light, a Realm of Darkness, and the Realm Between." Ansem holds out one, two, three fingers as he names these. "Individual worlds reside within them; Radiant Garden, in the Realm of Light. There is only so much I can tell you of fact, aside from them being spaces where the forces are stronger, weaker, or in a tremulous balance." But he does. And as for the other question...

His brow furrows. Would that he could be more specific...he would. But. "I know they exist. I believe I have met one or two in the past. A...Princess of Light, if you would. But if it is knowledge of those beings of Light and Darkness that you seek, I would direct you to Even."

A sip- and then he lowers the cup of coffee, staring directly at Elidibus.

"And while I am happy to share knowledge with you- what is your purpose here, Elidibus? You would not have mentioned what you have were you only a scholar." He meant to catch Ansem's attention. He meant to provoke reaction.

But what does he mean by such?

Edited 2021-06-10 22:09 (UTC)

The outline of the Realms certainly catches the Ascian's interest. It's almost disappointing that so little is given but perhaps it can be returned to one day. As to the existence of natural creatures of Light and Dark... "I will endeavor to do so." Yes, he will speak to Even at some point soon.

Elidibus has not touched the coffee be brought with him. The curiosity was settled and he had not taken the beverage for any other purpose. Though perhaps he will try it when it has cooled to see what that difference is like.

"I would have your measure," Elidibus responds. "Your apprentice spoke highly of your fairness and wisdom regardless of emotional turmoil. He spoke of great faith in you." While the Ascian may well be speaking this words and watching for Ansem's reaction, there is an utter lack of malice in them. Clinical, almost.

Elidibus knew there was more chance that Xehanort was being too naive. But there is also the possibility Ansem is just as wise and fair even in the face of terrible memories as Xehanort believed.

"Tell me of today's events. Was his trust well-founded?"

Now Elidibus goes for the throat.

Oh, Xehanort.

And this- this is the crack in Ansem's composure. This is him closing his eyes, and a humorless smile gracing his lips as he he reflects on their conversation. Their words. His words, and his actions. And oh, that is regret coming through his posture and his voice, for whatever happened today, Ansem clearly wishes that it did not.

"...He will determine that for himself. I would not speak for him. But if he chose to change his opinion of me - then I would not blame him in the slightest, for I was cruel to one who did not deserve such treatment."

If nothing else? He can admit he was wrong.

"I will apologize to him and offer reparations," Ansem continues, opening his eyes, smile turning just a bit bitter. "More, I cannot say, for the future is uncertain. He is a good man," he adds, just a bit softer. "And this reminder that I am not infallible has given me much to reflect on. But, I am...glad. That there seems to be another whom is interested in his well-being. Would you call him 'friend', then?"

Elidibus lets Ansem speak without interruption. Without a hint of disappointment or judgement. Just the calm observation that has colored near the entirety of this meeting. It probably isn't surprising anymore.

He speaks only after the king finishes.

"I did not ask if he should feel his trust misplaced, King of Radiant Garden," the matter of fact words may well be alarming to some in its lack of negative or positive emotional tone. "If I wished to judge your worth through his eyes, I would have been content with what I already know."

Though how Ansem answered has already told a story of its own.

"How did you take advantage of his trust? What thoughts led you to conclude it was the correct path?"

Whether Elidibus is a friend though... It's a question that remains notably unanswered at this time.

This feels less like a conversation and more like a trial. There are a few long moments of Ansem regarding Elidibus before he reclaims his coffee once more, and another few long moments in which he brings it to his lips and takes a long, slow sip. When he is done...

"Are you a judge, then?"

If he is offended by such, he shows no sign. While he still seems remoseful, there is the feeling that he is slowly bringing back up his metaphorical barriers.

[CLOSED] how could I ever think it's funny

and now a very special guest

Oh you think you're getting COFFEE do you? (Answer: Probably.)

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vague hands because what is kingdom hearts and its world setup, really

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